The Saiyans Generation 3
by Vickychan
Summary: Vegeta is terrorised by a group of saiyan women that turn out to be the female versions of him, Goku, Nappa and Raditz! And as it turns out, things went a very different way in their universe.
1. Who's the Hottie?

**Author's Note:-  
** Sorry about the long wait for Generation 3! To be honest my Gen 3 sketches are kind of all over the place, I didn't know which one to post first because they're all sort of set in the middle of Gen 3 and none of them really 'introduce' the series, so I wrote this little sketch to at least explain Goka's sudden existence, and well... I hope you like it! Although I promise the following sketches will be much better :p  
Please R&R!

* * *

It was years after his encounter with his female counterpart on board Frieza's ship, and Vegeta was now living in Capsule Corps. He was married to a human woman named Bulma and they had between them an eight-year-old son named Trunks. Frieza, Zarbon, Dodoria, Nappa and Raditz were all dead, and Vegeta hadn't seen or heard from their female counterparts since he was seventeen. He presumed they were alive somewhere in their universe, but he didn't particularly care if they were. As he made his way through Capsule Corps there was a knock at the door, just as Vegeta was walking past it. He stopped and frowned in annoyance.  
"Bulma, the door!" Vegeta yelled through the house. There was no answer from his wife, but the knocking continued. "Bulma!" Vegeta roared from next to the door. "Door!" There was still no answer, but the knocking grew louder. Vegeta let out an angry sigh. "Oh, for – **fine** I'll answer the door! I'm the only goddamn royalty in this place but of course I'll answer the fucking door!" He held out his hand and opened the door to Capsule Corps.

In the doorway there stood an attractive woman, a little younger than Vegeta. She was wearing an orange dress with a blue belt and undershirt, and blue boots. She had long spikey ebony hair that bounced off her shoulders and down her back. Her eyes were dark and had a certain power about them; in a way they seemed gentle, but they held a discreet but powerful sense of passion and wildness within them. Her body was slim and toned and her lips firm but feminine, pink and inviting. She was a _stunner_!

Vegeta looked the girl up and down and smirked at her. "Hi." He purred.  
"Hi!" The girl beamed. "Sorry, I didn't know they had company over – huh?" She looked at Vegeta, and blinked in confusion, then spoke in his native language. "You're a saiyan?"  
"Yeah…" Vegeta answered, also in saiyan and taken aback that she could actually speak the language. He moved his eyes to her waist and noticed that she had a tail. _"What the hell?"_ He thought silently.  
"Thought so!" The girl grinned. "I would know a saiyan smell anywhere!" She giggled. "I never saw a boy saiyan before though… don't the boys have tails? My sister never mentioned that… Anyway, I thought there weren't any boys left?"  
"And I thought it was _only_ boys left." Vegeta frowned. "How did you escape Planet Vegeta?" He started to smirk. "Not that I'm complaining… You got a mate, Brown Eyes?"  
"Yeah, sorry…" The girl smiled a little. "But for the record, you're a little too short for me anyway."  
"What the – **hey**!" Vegeta snarled. "Show some goddamn respect! If you can speak our language you should know how to address your prince, didn't your sister ever teach you that!"  
"Prince? But… I thought the saiyans just had a princess? Now I'm really confused!" The girl whined, squinting in confusion.  
"Princess?" Vegeta repeated. "No, it's - - - … … huh…" He paused for a moment, speaking silently to himself. _"Those girls on Frieza's ship… Wow. I haven't thought about them in years! … Well, I haven't thought about Nanapa anyway."_

Vegeta looked at the girl. "Uh… what was your name again?"  
"Oh – well my saiyan name is Karita." She answered.  
"Right. Karita. This princess of yours – is her name Yasa?" Vegeta questioned.  
"Yeah, that's it!" Karita nodded. "So if you're the prince, does that mean she's your sister or something? Yasa never said she had a brother!"  
"Well she's not technically…" Vegeta mumbled. "Hey, what do you mean your saiyan name? What other kind of name do you have?"  
"Well… before I met my sister, the humans called me Goka." Karita replied.  
"The…" Vegeta turned blue. "The… what?"  
"The humans. They live on Earth." Karita answered. "I'm surprised you don't know that, seeing as you're standing in Boxas' house."  
"You're…" Vegeta gagged.

Right at that moment Goku turned up beside Karita.  
"Hey Vegeta, wanna spar?" He grinned, then looked at Karita. "^_^ Hi. I'm Goku." He introduced himself.  
"^_^ Goka." Karita answered. She looked him up and down, sensing he was a saiyan. "But… you should probably call me Karita."  
"Uh… sure, whatever you say." Goku shrugged. "Nice to meet you, Karita."  
"You too!" Karita beamed.

Goku and Karita stared at each other in silence for a moment before they both turned to Vegeta and uttered,  
"Who's the hottie?"


	2. 02 How Things Went Down

"So… you're the female version of me." Goku said, looking at Karita. He was in the kitchen of Capsule Corps with Karita and Vegeta, after listening to Vegeta explain who this saiyan woman was.  
"Yeah, I guess so…" Karita smiled. "It's a shame! You're just Raidisha's type, she'll be so mad when she finds out you're her brother so she can't date you."  
"Right… Thanks, I guess?" Goku sweat dropped. "But it's kind of hard to picture Raditz as a girl." He looked at Vegeta. "Why didn't you ever tell me about this?"  
"I never thought I'd see those girls again." Vegeta said with a shrug. "Plus, what was I going to say? When I was seventeen Frieza's ship got invaded by a bunch of girls that turned out to be the female versions of myself, Nappa, Raditz, Frieza, Zarbon and Dodoria, from another universe? And the reason they came to us was because Girl Frieza was a total wuss that wanted Frieza to teach her how to be evil, but in the end she decided she wanted to be kind to people so she released her saiyans, Yasa, Nanapa and Raidisha, and dropped them off on Earth?"  
"Yeah that's pretty much the summary of Generation 2 ^_^'" Goku replied.

Karita frowned as she watched the two male saiyans, listening to their words.  
"Why don't you talk to each other in saiyan?" She questioned.  
"I don't speak saiyan…" Goku answered. "You do?" Karita nodded.  
"Yeah well my sister tried to teach me but I just couldn't get it…" She replied. "But the others talk to each other in saiyan all the time, so I guess I picked it up subconsciously because one day I woke up and I could just understand what they were saying. Then after a while, I could speak it too. But…" Karita moved her eyes down to Goku and Vegeta's waists, staring at them in surprise. "It's weird they never told me that boy saiyans don't have tails."  
"Oh, they do. We just lost ours." Goku said. "But we don't need them anyway."  
"I guess not… nobody needs oozaru when you're a super saiyan, right?" Karita beamed.  
"Yeah!" Goku grinned. "And you can actually control your super saiyan form."  
"Huh?" Karita looked at him. "You can't control your oozaru?"  
"You can?" Goku blinked.  
"Yeah, Raidisha, Yasa and Nanapa taught me how to do it the same time they helped me train against my tail being grabbed." Karita said.  
"Huh…" Vegeta stared at Karita in amazement. "It's kind of weird seeing a version of Kakarot that actually acts like they grew up on Planet Vegeta."  
"But Vegeta, if I still had a tail you'd teach me how to control my oozaru, right?" Goku asked him.  
"Yeah sure whatever." Vegeta replied, waving his hand dismissively. He looked at Karita. "What the hell are you doing here anyway?"  
"Oh, Boxas – that's Yasa's husband – he made a dimension traveller after Raidisha said it'd be fun to go back to your universe to see how you guys are." Karita explained. "Then he left it on the side and told us not to touch it…"  
"And you did? -_- Baka." Vegeta growled.  
"It's not my fault!" Karita protested. "Raidisha dared me to! But it's okay – I'll just hang out here until they come and find me, it shouldn't be too long."

At that moment the sound of an explosion can be heard nearby, as if it was coming from the entrance to Capsule Corps. "Oh, this'll be them." Karita beamed, and her voice was followed by the sound of three female voices drawing closer to the room.  
"What the hell, Raidisha! You just blew up my door!" One of the women yelled. Vegeta recognised her voice… It was unmistakable. It was his voice – or the voice of his counterpart, at least. Yasa. The princess of saiyans.  
"Oh don't exaggerate Yasa!" A second voice replied. Vegeta knew that one… dammit, who was it again? "This is the boys' universe, right? At most it's Vegeta's door."  
"So you decide to blow it up!" Yasa protested.  
"I've always wanted to see how easy it is to blow up Capsule Corps – this is my one chance to do it!" The same voice replied.  
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Yasa yelled.  
"And Raidisha, how do you know Vegeta even lives here? He's probably still working for Frieza somewhere else in the universe, with Raditz and Nappa." A third voice spoke… Right, that second voice was Raidisha, the female version of Raditz! Which would make the third voice Nanapa, female Nappa.  
"Yeah, why are we even on Earth?" Yasa questioned. "If you want to see the guys again Raidisha this is the last place we should look."  
"Duh! I know that! But Karita's in Capsule Corps in this universe, right? So we should pick her up before we do _anything_." Raidisha answered.  
"By 'anything' do you mean travel to other universes? Like that one where _you're_ the queen of saiyans?" Nanapa said, sounding unimpressed.  
"Yeah!" Raidisha exclaimed.  
"So why did we do that first, Raidisha?" Yasa asked, also sounding unimpressed.  
"Yeah!" Raidisha exclaimed again.  
"What do you mean, 'yeah'?" Yasa growled.  
"Yeah!"  
" _ **Stop saying that**_!"

Suddenly the three saiyan women appeared at the open doorway to the kitchen of Capsule Corps and looked in to see Vegeta, Goku and Karita.  
"Huh?" The three women uttered.  
"Hi guys!" Karita greeted them. "This is Vegeta and –"  
" **Wow**!" The three saiyan women all exclaimed, staring at Goku with wide eyes.  
"Wow…" Raidisha gasped. "Vegeta, I always thought you had promise as a kid, but I never expected this transformation!"  
"Yeah, growing up really suits you!" Nanapa grinned.  
"What do you expect girls, he is me." Yasa said with a smirk.  
"Yu-huh!" Nanapa and Raidisha both nodded, taking one of Goku's arms each.  
"Hey Vegeta, you're not married in this universe are you?" Raidisha asked him.  
"Well if you are, how about an upgrade? I am an elite saiyan, remember?" Nanapa put her hand on Goku's ass and blinked in surprise. "Huh?" She looked down at the empty space around his waist. "Hey, what happened to your tail? What am I supposed to play with?"  
"Uh… girls?" Goku sweat dropped. "I'm not Vegeta."  
"Huh?" Nanapa and Raidisha uttered.  
"That's Vegeta." Goku said, pointing at the saiyan prince.

Yasa, Nanapa and Raidisha moved their eyes to look at Vegeta, and gasped.  
" _ **What**_!" They cried out.  
"Oh my God! Life with Frieza really did a number on you!" Raidisha exclaimed.  
"What!" Vegeta barked. "What do you mean!" Yasa stared at Vegeta for a long moment, and then turned to Nanapa and Raidisha.  
"Girls, I am prettier than that, right?" She asked.  
"Yeah… you definitely look better as a girl, Ya-sama." Raidisha answered.  
"Why you –" Vegeta moved towards her and grabbed Raidisha by the throat. "You know what Raidisha? I never did like you!" He snarled. Raidisha smirked.  
"Okay, maybe he's not so bad… Tighter, Sire." She winked at him, causing Vegeta to turn blue.  
"Ew!" He gagged, and let her go.  
"Okay so…" Nanapa pulled Goku against her. "Who's this piece of gourmet eye candy? Seriously Raidisha, if this is Raditz he has **totally** moved up in the world and he's about to get sat on!"  
"What does that mean…?" Goku whimpered, becoming crushed against Nanapa's large masculine frame.  
"Uh… guys, that's me." Karita answered.  
"Huh!" Yasa, Nanapa and Raidisha all choked in surprise.  
"That's you!" Yasa looked at Goku. "… …" She sweat dropped. "So I guess this universe is inverted in every way, because you're not better looking than me in _our_ universe." She turned to Nanapa and Raidisha. "Right guys?"  
"Nah Yasa, it's official – our family is totally hotter than yours!" Raidisha grinned.  
"Shut the hell up!" Yasa barked.

Nanapa let out a sigh.  
"That's disappointing… I bet Pi-Pi's still around in this universe too…" She held Goku up to her face. "You got a wife, Handsome?"  
"Yeah, and two sons." Goku answered, breaking away from her. "So… I guess that means I'm useless to you, right?" Nanapa smirked and took a step towards him.  
"On the contrary, it means every part of you works!" She purred.  
"Nanapa, quit it! He's married!" Karita scolded. "Oh –" She looked at Vegeta. "I forgot to ask – do you have a wife too?"  
"Yeah, Bulma. I think she went out with Trunks." Vegeta moved his eyes to Yasa. "What do you call your daughter? You got a kid now, right?"  
"Yeah, Panties." Yasa nodded.  
"Nice name." Vegeta commented.  
"Thanks." Yasa said. "So… how have you guys been? Does Nappa live here with you?"  
"Nappa?" Vegeta blinked.  
"Yeah!" Raidisha looked at Goku. "And Raditz lives with you, right?"

Vegeta and Goku sweat dropped.  
"Uh…"  
"Things went… kind of a different way in this universe…" Vegeta mumbled.  
"Huh?" The girls uttered.  
"Different how?" Yasa asked.  
"Maybe we shouldn't tell you…" Goku said. "I mean, you all seem really close…"  
"Ah, come on! It's a different universe, right? So of course things happened differently!" Nanapa reasoned.  
"Yeah, we don't care!" Raidisha beamed. "Go ahead and tell us whatever you want!"  
"Uh-huh!" Karita nodded in agreement.  
"Okay, well –"  
"Kakarot." Vegeta interrupted him. " _Don't_."  
"But they said they don't mind –"  
"I can guarantee they'll change their minds if you tell them what happened!" Vegeta cut Goku off again.  
"Vegeta, come on! No we won't!" Raidisha protested.  
"We promise!" Karita swore.

Goku looked at the four saiyan women.  
"You really promise not to get mad?" He said. The girls nodded.  
"Jeez, what the hell are you so worried about?" Yasa snorted. "What, did you kill us all or something?"  
"Well…"

A moment later Raidisha's angry voice cascaded off the walls.  
" _ **You bitch**_!" She roared and fired a ki blast at Karita.  
"I'm the bitch!" Karita screamed, deflecting the blast. "You were the one that kidnapped my daughter! And you killed me too, by the way!"  
"Some kind of princess you are!" Nanapa roared at Yasa. "Who the hell kills her own people!" She fired a ki blast at Yasa.  
"Well if you weren't so weak I wouldn't have needed to!" Yasa yelled back, dodging the ki blast and allowing it to make a hole in the wall behind her.  
"Weak!" Nanapa snarled. "How dare you, I practically raised you and this is the thanks I get!" She blasted Yasa again, but Yasa deflected the blast and screamed back at her,  
"You raised me for all of five minutes before I got stronger than you anyway! What kind of elite can't even turn super saiyan, even Karita can do it! And while we're talking about her –" Yasa turned to Karita. "Where the hell do you get off attacking your princess!" She threw a ki blast at her.  
"Where the hell do **you** get off trying to kill me and all my friends!" Karita argued, blasting her back.  
"Where do all of you get off betraying me!" Raidisha glared at Yasa and Nanapa. "It's good to know that if I ever get killed by my own sister you guys will just stand around going on about how weak I am!"  
"Oh shut up Raidisha, maybe if you stopped chasing guys for five minutes you wouldn't be so weak!" Nanapa snarled and blasted at her.  
"Well you **never** have any luck with guys and you're still not a super saiyan!" Raidisha blasted back.  
"All three of you can go to hell!" Yasa roared and fired a ki blast at Nanapa, Raidisha and Karita.  
" **You too**!" The three of them screamed back and all fired a blast at Yasa.

The women continued arguing and blasting each other, slowly destroying Capsule Corps as Goku and Vegeta stood watching. Vegeta slapped Goku harshly.  
"You see now why I said not to tell them!" He snapped. "Bulma is going to go fucking apeshit when she gets home, we just had the bedroom redecorated!"  
"You had it decorated last month as well!" Goku exclaimed. "How do you guys get it so dirty?"  
"That - - we - - that's none of your goddamn business!" Vegeta barked, and the girls continued fighting.  
"Should we at least tell them to take it outside…?" Goku mumbled.  
"No that won't work, you're gonna have to fight them." Vegeta replied. "But remember Yasa and Karita are as strong as me and you, so you probably shouldn't have anything weighing you down."  
"Okay, good idea!" Goku beamed and took his shirt off, causing the girls to instantly stop to stare at him.  
"Holy hell…" Nanapa drooled.  
"I wish incest wasn't so frowned upon…" Raidisha mumbled.  
"Or adultery…" Yasa added.  
 _"Pathetic."_ Vegeta thought to himself. _"Truly pathetic."_  
"Well I think he'd be okay with me," Karita said. "Because it's only what I do when Pi-Pi is tired anyway."  
" _ **Ew**_!" Everyone gagged with wide eyes.  
"Okay you guys can go back to fighting…" Vegeta mumbled, mentally scrubbing his brain.


	3. Challenge Accepted!

After almost destroying Capsule Corps the saiyan girls were all sat around the kitchen table in silence, infuriated with each other. Nanapa was glaring at Yasa as Yasa glared back, and opposite them sat Raidisha who was glaring at Karita, and in turn Karita was glaring at Raidisha. Goku and Vegeta sweat dropped, well aware of the tension that was steadily rising between the women.

Yasa looked around the badly damaged kitchen.  
"Sorry about your place, Vegeta." She said.  
"Yeah you will be." Vegeta growled.  
"What's that supposed to mean!" Yasa snapped.

All of a sudden the sound of the front door could be heard and within milliseconds an almighty wail cascaded through the house,  
" ** _Vegeta_**!"  
"Oh wow, you girls are in trouble now…" Goku uttered.  
"Tch! Yeah, right!" Raidisha snorted. "Who's that, Girl Boxas?"  
" ** _Goku_**! Is that you I hear!" The same voice screamed through Capsule Corps.  
"Dammit!" Goku exclaimed and ducked down.  
"Is she really that scary…?" Karita mumbled.  
"Like hell she is!" Nanapa spat. "Boxas yells a lot but he's just a human weakling."  
"Why don't you say that to his face, Nanapa?" Yasa challenged.  
"Excuse me but if you recall I'm not a spineless bitch like you! I **did** say it to his face!" Nanapa snapped.  
"Oh yeah…" Yasa smirked. "I remember that week you spent locked out of the house."  
"Traitor." Nanapa growled.  
"Hobo." Yasa sniped back.

At that moment Bulma came storming into the kitchen in a blind rage, instantly locking her eyes onto her husband.  
"Vegeta what did I tell you guys about sparring in the –" She stopped suddenly when she noticed that Vegeta was not alone in the room. "… Hey, so why are there four beautiful women I've never met before in my kitchen when you're home alone?"  
"Aww…" Nanapa smiled. Bulma looked at her.  
"… Okay three beautiful women." She corrected herself. Nanapa simply sat sulking while Yasa sniggered triumphantly.  
"It's not what it looks like, Bulma!" Goku protested. "Me and Vegeta didn't destroy the house – they did! They got mad at each other because we killed Nappa and Raditz."  
"What?" Bulma blinked. Vegeta let out a sigh.  
"Listen, it's like this…" He proceeded to explain everything in just a few short words.  
"Huh? So these are saiyans?" Bulma said, and noticed the girls' tails. "… Oh yeah. Wow…" She moved her eyes to Karita and blushed slightly. "So Vegeta, this is you as a girl? She's beautiful!"  
" ** _Grrrr_** …" Yasa snarled, clenching her fist.  
"Thanks, but I'm Kakarot." Karita smiled, and pointed at Yasa. "That's Vegeta."

Bulma turned her gaze to the saiyan princess and looked her up and down.  
"Oh. … … Well she's still around the same league as me, so I guess that still makes her pretty good looking!" She grinned.  
"Yeah whatever!" Yasa spat. "I'm like two leagues above you, you should be honoured to be married to me!"  
"Yeah but I'd get out of here if I were you Bulma, before she kills you as well." Nanapa bitterly remarked.  
"Shut up!" Yasa yelled and fired a ki blast at her.  
" ** _Stop blowing up my house_**!" Bulma screamed. She took a deep breath to calm herself before letting out an angry sigh. "Why are you girls even fighting anyway? Just because it happened in this universe it doesn't mean you all have to be enemies!" She looked at Yasa and Karita. "Have you girls ever been pregnant?" Bulma demanded.  
"Uh… yeah?" Yasa answered, baffled by her question.  
"Twice!" Karita beamed.  
"Yeah well –" Bulma pointed at Goku and Vegeta. "These guys haven't, and big surprise they never will be! So do you think that maybe in your universe you guys **won't** end up enemies?"  
"… Hmph." The girls all looked away stubbornly, slowly realising that Bulma had a point.

Finally Karita looked up at the others.  
"Guys, she's right…" She uttered, and moved her eyes to Raidisha. "We shouldn't fall out over what happened between Kakarot and Raditz. I would never want to kill you, Raidisha. I'm sorry."  
"You know I would never harm either of your kids, right?" Raidisha replied.  
"Yeah, I know." Karita smiled and held out her hand to Raidisha. Raidisha smiled back, and they shook hands.  
"Hey…" Nanapa looked at Yasa. "You… wouldn't really kill me just for being weak, would you?"  
"Hm? Oh…" Yasa looks away, blushing slightly. "I guess not. It'd be such a waste of my energy…"  
"Apology accepted." Nanapa smirked.  
"What! That wasn't a –"  
"Okay well that's settled!" Bulma beamed, interrupting Yasa. "Now… the most important question of all…" Everyone looked at her, wondering what she was about to say. Bulma looked at Yasa and blushed slightly.  
"Is it decent?" She asked.  
"Huh?" Vegeta choked, wide-eyed. Yasa reddened and looked away, her face growing darker as she spoke in a quiet voice,  
"You have big breasts don't you? Go figure…"  
"Okay! So glad to hear that!" Bulma sighed in relief. "So you guys want a drink?"  
"Yes please." The girls nodded.

Yasa frowned at the feeling of somebody's eyes on her.  
"Hm?" She looked down to see an eight-year-old Trunks is staring at her. "…?"  
"So… you're like, my dad?" Trunks questioned.  
"Yeah kid, I guess I am." Yasa said with a smirk.  
"Wow." Trunks uttered, gazing at her. " … … … You're a milf!"  
" ** _What_**! Where the hell did you learn language like that!" Yasa roared and hit Trunks, ignoring the sound of Vegeta's sniggering as she clenched her fists at the child. "Get the hell out of here you dirty little brat!" She yelled.  
"Tch. You sound like my mom." Trunks grumbled and left the room.

Raidisha watched Trunks leave and grinned.  
"Hey, he's so cute!" She exclaimed and looked at Karita. "We should totally go check out Gotenshi! You think Pi-Pi's a drag in this universe too?"  
"What? Pi-Pi's not a drag!" Karita gasped.  
"What, are you _kidding_ me?" Raidisha protested. "Karita, who's this: 'Get the hell out of my house Raidisha, get off your ass and get a job Raidisha, stop taking all of our food Raidisha, stop teaching my daughter curse words Raidisha!' Geez, what a nag!"  
"Haha, that sounds like the same girl alright!" Vegeta declared with a grin. "She's called Chi-Chi over here and she's a total drag."  
"Vegeta, Chi-Chi's not that bad…" Goku frowned.  
"She can't hear you now Kakarot, you don't have to say that." Vegeta stated.  
"Yeah well you know what the worst part is? I _did_ get a job!" Raidisha protested. "I've had hundreds of jobs, and he's still not happy!"  
"Yeah but…" Karita looked at her. "When Pi-Pi told you to get a job, he meant for you to get a job and then stay in it long enough to earn money."  
"Well then he should have said that!" Raidisha pouted. "Anyway he should be the one paying me – I taught his daughters how to act like real saiyans, they'd be way weaker if it wasn't for my influence!"

Bulma looked at the girls, raising her eyebrow a little.  
"Huh… I wonder if there is much of a difference between all of you…" She looked Karita. "How old were you when you all met anyway?"  
"I was twelve – actually it was right after we defeated Empress Pilaf, Bulma." Karita answered with a smile. "I was about to go and search for my grandma's four star dragonball when these guys showed up and told me I was a saiyan, and then my sister came with me to Kame House…" She sweat dropped. "But… she was a bad student… she didn't stick around for very long…"  
"Yeah, because that stupid old woman was a lousy teacher!" Raidisha frowned. "You should have let **us** train you from the start, then maybe you would have learned to train your tail before you were thirteen!"  
"Thirteen?" Goku sweat dropped. "But when I was that age it was still a weakness…"  
"What, and you can't control your oozaru either?" Karita gasped. "Next you'll be telling me you were over twenty-three when you became a super saiyan!"  
"I was… twenty-five…" Goku mumbled sheepishly.  
"Haha!" Raidisha grinned. "Kari-chan, it looks like having us around made you stronger! I bet you could totally kick this guy's ass!"  
"That sounds like a challenge." Yasa smirked. "Kakarot, how about you and Karita go outside and she can show you what it feels like to be beaten by a girl?"  
"Yeah!" Nanapa clenched her fist and grinned at Goku. "And when she's done with the meat I'll pick at the bones, Sugarcane." She winked at him.  
"Fine, that sounds fun!" Goku beamed. "Uh – the fighting I mean. Not…" He looked at Nanapa cautiously. "Not the thing you're talking about…"  
"Tch. You don't know what you're missing." Nanapa snarled.  
"Yeah I think he does, that's probably why he's choosing to miss it." Yasa replied.

Goku looked at Karita.  
"But listen – don't get cocky Karita, just because you grew quicker than me it doesn't mean you're stronger now." He said. Karita simply smirked, and said something in saiyan. "What?" Goku frowned.  
"She said 'a weakling says what'." Vegeta growled, looking at him in annoyance.  
"Raidisha taught me that." Karita grinned. Goku looked at her and muttered,  
"… Bitch."  
"Okay! On with the fight!" Raidisha announced and started to make her way outside, followed by the rest of the saiyan women.  
"Uh…" Bulma looked at Goku. "Hey – if Chi-Chi calls, what do you want me to say?"  
"Tell her I'm having a fight with myself!" Goku beamed and ran after the girls, accompanied by Vegeta.  
"Great, then she'll think you're having a Goku-Kakarot identity crisis, that sounds like a fun conversation I'm gonna have to have with her." Bulma growled and reluctantly followed.

XXXXX

 **Author's Note:-**  
So I hope you liked this chapter! At the moment I'm writing this alongside A Night Of Hell, so what I'll probably do is post a chapter for each on alternate days, so stay tuned for that :) And please R&R! Thank you!


	4. Goku vs Goku

Outside Capsule Corps everyone was gathered round, preparing for Goku's fight against Karita.  
"Come on Kari-chan!" Raidisha cheered.  
"I feel like I've forgotten something…" Karita mumbled, reluctant to start the fight.  
"Forgotten what?" Raidisha asked.  
"I don't know…" Karita replied.  
"Ah, it can't be that important. Come on, fight him!" Raidisha cried.  
"Come on!" Goku frowned impatiently. "Are we doing this?"  
"Yeah, but… Maybe it was important…" Karita uttered, still deep in thought.  
"Hey! Are you going to fight him or not?" Nanapa demanded.  
"Yeah Karita, quit dragging it out or I'll kill him myself!" Yasa growled.  
"Yeah Yasa, if he's weaker in this universe then maybe you can actually beat this Karita!" Raidisha said with a smirk.  
"Shut up, Rai." Yasa snarled. Bulma smirked and looked at her husband.  
"Hey Vegeta –"  
" _ **Don't**_." Vegeta cut her off before she could utter another word.

Finally Karita decided to shake off her misgivings and looked at Goku.  
"Right! Let's go!"  
"Ready when you are." Goku beamed.  
"Okay, fighting stances!" Nanapa announced. Goku and Karita got into position and waited for Nanapa's command. "Fight!"

Goku and Karita immediately started fighting, going at each other with their full strength. It was only mere seconds before Karita jumped into the air to avoid an attack; she was closely followed by Goku and they started sparring in mid- air, unaware that the others were staring up at Karita with wide eyes.  
"Hey – Karita!" Yasa gasped.  
"Something she forgot…" Nanapa mumbled, blushing.  
"Ha ha…" Raidisha sweat dropped.  
"Wow…" Vegeta uttered, staring up at the little orange pleated skirt that was blowing around on Karita's frame and the tiny pink panties that resided under it.  
"Hm?" Bulma looked at Vegeta and angrily clenched her fist. " **Hey**!" She punched him with all her might. "Stop looking at her!"  
"Ow!" Vegeta glared at Bulma. "I wasn't!"

Meanwhile Goku and Karita were still fighting, oblivious to what was going on beneath them when Yasa appeared between the two saiyans.  
"Hold on!" She cried, holding her arms out to separate the pair.  
"Huh?" Goku uttered. Karita blinked in confusion.  
"What?" She asked.  
"Karita…" Yasa took hold of Karita and slowly took her back down to the ground. "By any chance, did you forget to put your _**shorts**_ on this morning?"  
"Huh?" Karita blinked and started to think back.  
"Pink panties! _**Kawaii**_!" Raidisha exclaimed.  
"… _**Yes**_!" Karita grinned triumphantly. "That's it! I forgot my shorts! I **knew** I'd forgotten something!" Yasa, Nanapa, Raidisha, Vegeta and Bulma all sweat dropped.

Unware of the conversation Goku landed in front of the group and looked across them, frowning in bewilderment.  
"Hey, are we still fighting?" He asked.  
"And with that skirt it's obvious…" Yasa continued talking to Karita. "You should get one like mine." She turned around to show Karita her non-pleated black skirt. "If it's tight it won't blow around." Nanapa nudged Raidisha and smirked.  
"Sure, _that's_ why she wears it." She sniggered.  
"What are you implying!" Yasa snapped, turning red.  
"Nothing, Yasa-sama." Nanapa smiled.  
"But she only started wearing it after she began noticing boys, right Nana?" Raidisha grinned. Nanapa smirked again.  
" _Right_."  
"That's not true!" Yasa protested. "I wore a skirt when I was a kid!"  
"But back then you didn't have a choice." Nanapa replied.  
"How dare you suggest something like that!" Yasa gasped. "My mother wore a skirt like this too!"  
"Yeah, and she wore it the most when your dad was around." Raidisha smirked.  
"Yasa was born pretty soon after they got married, wasn't she?" Nanapa sniggered and she and Raidisha both laughed.  
" **Silence**!" Yasa roared. "How _**dare**_ you say that about your queen!"  
"Hey, don't worry about it." Raidisha shrugged, waving a dismissive hand. "Good-looking people should show off."

Meanwhile Karita started tugging at Yasa's skirt.  
"I get it… But isn't it harder to move?" She questioned.  
"Hey!" Yasa yelling, blushing. She slapped Karita's hand away and snarled, "Look with your eyes, Karita!"  
"Sorry." Karita replied sheepishly.  
"But it's not hard to move anyway. It's not long enough to get in the way." Yasa answered her question. Raidisha nudged Nanapa, grinning.  
"Yeah that's her excuse, right? To 'stop it getting in the way'."  
" _ **Shut up**_!" Yasa snapped, glaring at Raidisha. Raidisha waved her hand again.  
"Calm down, we all do it. I don't cover my legs either, right? I mean – why would I? And check out Bulma." She pointed. "There's no way she doesn't consider herself a milf, you can totally tell she's wearing a push up bra!"  
"What! No I'm not!" Bulma argued, blushing. "For your information this is my _natural_ size!"  
"Huh?" Raidisha looked at her. "Really? They didn't sag after you had a kid?"  
"Well maybe a little, but - -" Bulma's blush deepened. "Uh…"  
"Oh yeah…" Raidisha mumbled as she squeezed Bulma's chest. "You know Kari-chan and Yasa didn't sag much, but I figured it was because they got back into training after. Hey Vegeta, for someone with such a small power level your wife really has a good figure!" She waited for his response, but Vegeta remained silent. "Vegeta?" Raidisha looked to see Vegeta watching her, his cheeks red and his eyes wide.  
"… you should… check out her ass now…" He uttered almost hypnotically.  
"Quit it!" Bulma yelled and hit him.  
"What! I'm paying you a compliment!" Vegeta protested.  
"You're trying to get a free show!" Bulma snapped.

Goku sweat dropped.  
"Uh… guys? Can we get back to fighting…?" He asked.  
"Yeah, now that we've established how hot we all are." Nanapa said.  
"You're not including yourself in that, are you?" Raidisha questioned.  
" _ **What**_! Don't be so rude!" Nanapa barked.  
"Don't worry about it Nanapa, I'm sure Kakarot will take his clothes off in a few minutes and that'll cheer you up." Yasa shrugged.  
"Huh?" Goku looked at her. "What makes you say that?"  
"Karita always does it." Raidisha answered. "Then she pretends like she has _no_ idea why people are staring at her even though we _all_ know she does it for attention."  
"What! No I don't!" Karita protested, blushing. "My clothes are specially weighted, you know that!"  
"Yeah, I know. But would you really risk taking them off if you weren't so pretty? I bet Kaka-kun does it too." Raidisha replied.  
"Yeah but – I don't do it for that reason!" Goku insisted.  
"Thing is, when you look like that nobody really cares what your reason is." Nanapa smirked.  
"Yeah yeah we get it Nanapa, you think he's hot. Now can you guys get this over with?" Vegeta growled. "Kakarot, just hurry up and beat her!"  
"Haha! Vegeta's pissed that nobody likes him! He's jealous of Kakarot!" Raidisha declared, grinning widely.  
"I am not!" Vegeta barked. "Just – get on with the fight!"  
"Okay!" Karita resumed her fighting stance and looked at Goku. "Ready?"  
"Ready!" Goku beamed, also taking a fighting stance, and the two of them started sparring.  
"Come on, Karita! Wipe the floor with him!" Raidisha cheered.  
"Kakarot! You better not let our side down!" Vegeta snarled.  
"This won't take all night, will it…?" Bulma mumbled.  
"Nah, Karita should beat him pretty soon." Raidisha confidently answered.

Hours later the fight was still going on; it was past midnight and neither Goku nor Karita were backing down. Bulma was sat under a blanket next to Vegeta, yawning as she watched the fight, which was now taking place in mid-air.  
"How long are they gonna keep this up…?" She asked sleepily.  
"Until one of them loses." Vegeta answered.  
"But it's _tomorrow_!" Bulma whined. "Does it really matter who wins?"  
"Of course! If Kakarot loses, that means that girls are better than the boys!" Vegeta protested.  
"Well I could have told you that." Bulma yawned again and leaned against Vegeta, falling asleep as he glared at her for that remark.  
"Come on, Karita! Stop fooling around and kill him!" Yasa yelled at the female fighter.  
"I don't get it." Raidisha uttered. "Karita is stronger because of us, why isn't she beating him?"  
"Hm… but… Karita didn't train much while she was pregnant, right?" Nanapa answered. "So that's almost two years right there, maybe Kakarot caught up to her?"  
"Oh yeah, I never thought of that…" Raidisha mumbled. She looked up at the fighters and yelled angrily, "Dammit Karita, I **told** you those kids were a bad idea! They totally ruined your life!"

Karita and Goku landed on the ground and faced each other, both of them panting heavily as they regained their breath and stared one another down.  
"Give… give up?" Karita breathed.  
"Not… not unless you do." Goku gasped.  
"Never!" Karita declared.  
"Me neither!" Goku yelled back.  
"Dammit Kakarot!" Karita growled, and panted. "Okay, let's finish this."  
"Gladly!" Goku replied, readying himself as they began their signature attack.  
"Kame…"  
"Kame… –"  
" _ **Goku**_!"

Everyone looked up at the sound of an angry voice and Chi-Chi came marching over to the group, her face filled with rage.  
" **Goku**! Where have you been!" She roared. "Do you know it's past midnight? You said you were coming over for a 'quick' spar with Vegeta over eight hours ago! This is **way** past your curfew!"  
"I guess that's Pi-Pi…" Nanapa mumbled.  
"Yeah she's a total bitch!" Raidisha exclaimed.  
"I'm sorry Chi-Chi but I can't come home now – we're having a boys versus girls match!" Goku said.  
"Yeah Chi-Chi he can't stop now, he has to defend our honour!" Vegeta nodded. "This match will determine whether boys win or lose." He looked at Goku. "And they **are** going to win, aren't they Kakarot?"  
"Totally!" Goku grinned.  
"Hmm…" Chi-Chi looked at Karita, and then at Goku. "… … Ha!" In one swift movement and with every ounce of strength in her body Chi-Chi kicked Goku in between the legs, with such force that the impact could be heard for miles around. Goku screamed in pain and collapsed to the ground, his eyes shut tight and his teeth gritted so hard he almost broke his jaw.  
"Oh look, I guess boys lose." Chi-Chi said casually and looked at Karita. "Well done." She glared at Goku. "Now come on!" She grabbed him by the ear and dragged him away, asking impatiently, "Who **were** those women anyway?"  
"It's a long story…" Goku sobbed.

Yasa, Nanapa, Raidisha and Karita were left standing there with wide eyes.  
"Wow…"  
"Oh wow, she's not afraid to do anything!" Raidisha gasped.  
"Yeah… even if it meant losing, I don't think I would **ever** do that…" Yasa uttered.  
"Yeah he's totally whipped." Vegeta growled. "It's pathetic how he lets his woman rule his life like that, I mean I'm sure he's scared of her! Tch. What kind of coward is scared of their own mate? Especially a human, the weak feeble creatures with a power level in single figures –" At that moment Bulma stirred in her sleep and Vegeta's eyes widened with panic.  
"Oh my God I'm sorry, I didn't mean it!" He cried. Bulma settled back to sleep without hearing a single word, and Vegeta blushed in embarrassment as the saiyan girls sniggered.  
"You were saying?" Yasa smirked.  
"Hey guys… do you think Kakarot will be okay?" Karita questioned.  
"If he's not I'll nurse him back to health." Nanapa smirked.  
"Shut up Nanapa." Vegeta growled, and mentally scrubbed his brain.


	5. High School

**Author's Note:-**  
So I wasn't going to continue this until I finished A Night Of Hell, but Shadow Dream Catcher inspired me to continue it now :p  
Anyway I hope you like this chapter guys - please review!

* * *

The next morning Bulma let out an angry sigh as she worked on the girls' dimension traveller, a device which had allowed them to travel between universes.  
"This thing is totally broken… Who the hell built this anyway!" She growled.  
"You did." Yasa answered flatly. Bulma blushed.  
"Oh… … Well, I guess the design isn't that bad. You guys have just been abusing it." She said.  
"See Raidisha, I told you we shouldn't have gone sight-seeing in all those different universes." Nanapa scolded.  
"But that's the whole point of the dimension traveller!" Raidisha protested defensively.  
"But Boxas specifically said you shouldn't use it too often." Yasa replied. "You wanted to come here to visit the guys, right? Maybe you should have just done that instead of looking for a universe where **you** were queen! It's your fault it's broken!"  
"Tch! Yeah right!" Raidisha snorted. "That thing was broken before we even touched it, that's how Karita ended up here by herself! I should kill your husband for putting my sister in danger!"  
"Shut the hell up, Raidisha! She landed in Capsule Corps, what's so dangerous about that!" Yasa barked. Raidisha smirked at her.  
"Yeah, you're right… Karita is stronger than you in every universe, right?" She teased.  
" _ **Grrrr**_ –"  
"Guys, this is gonna take me long enough to fix as it is without your arguing to distract me!" Bulma yelled.  
"Tch. Whatever." Yasa grunted and stood up. "I'm going to train with Vegeta."

Bulma looked at her.  
"What's the rush?" She questioned.  
"Hm?" Yasa met her gaze, frowning slightly in confusion.  
"I want you to tell me all about your relationship with Boxas." Bulma smiled. Yasa blushed slightly.  
"Seriously?" She uttered. "You have a relationship with Vegeta, can't you just assume it's the same?"  
"No way! You and Boxas have known each other since you were teenagers, right? And you didn't start off as a bad guy that tried to kill Goku – it's totally different!" Bulma protested.

Vegeta walked into the room, his eyes settling on Yasa impatiently.  
"Yasa, I thought you wanted to train?" He growled.  
"I'm coming!" Yasa replied and looked at Bulma. "It's pretty much the same Bulma, except we were in high school together."  
"What! You went to high school?" Vegeta gasped, staring at Yasa in shock.  
"Nanapa made me." Yasa muttered angrily.  
"Well you're a princess! You should have an education!" Nanapa argued. "If we were gonna live on Earth I didn't want you to be too stupid to blend into their society!"  
"You should have been concerned about your own stupidity." Yasa said with a smirk, causing Nanapa to growl at her in annoyance.

Vegeta looked at Yasa disapprovingly.  
"I can't believe you went to an Earth high school… That's so lame, Yasa." He said.  
"Shut up! I was only there for a year!" Yasa snapped.  
"You were there for about ten days over the course of a year!" Nanapa corrected her.  
"Don't exaggerate Nanapa. I did a couple of months at least." Yasa frowned.  
"Right, before you got expelled…" Karita mumbled.  
"Well you did too!" Yasa yelled.  
"But that's because I was following you!" Karita yelled back. "You told me to put bugs in Teacher's coffee because she likes the taste – but it made her really scared and they kicked me out of school!"  
"You should thank me for getting you out of that stupid place – and at least I only got you expelled for bugging the teacher's coffee – I could have just as easily killed someone and blamed it on you." Yasa said, causing Karita to shoot her an argumentative glare.

Bulma tried not to vomit at the thought of bug-filled coffee, and sweat dropped.  
"So anyway…" She uttered, changing the subject. She looked at Yasa. "We were in the same class in high school?"  
"Yeah." Yasa nodded.  
"But you're a year older than me – why weren't you in the grade above?" Bulma questioned. Yasa blushed.  
"Uh… well…"  
"Yasa's dumb." Raidisha grinned.  
" _ **Shut up Raidisha**_!" Yasa snarled. Bulma smirked, giggling a little.  
"Figures." She said.  
"Shut up Bulma." Vegeta muttered.  
"Hmph." Bulma grunted. "So…" She looked at Yasa with wide love heart eyes and red cheeks, smiling brightly. "Were we high school sweethearts? Vegeta, how cute is that!"  
"Yeah, great." Vegeta mumbled unenthusiastically.  
"No. You were still with Yamchala until we were adults. Even though you broke up with her like _all_ the time." Yasa replied. Bulma's face fell.  
"Oh… really?" She mumbled disappointedly.  
"Yeah." Yasa blushed and looked away. "But we… went to the prom together."

Bulma squealed loudly and jumped up, her fists clenched and her cheeks bright red.  
"Ooo! Really? That's so romantic! Vegeta, we went to the prom together!" She exclaimed.  
"That sounds lame, Bulma." Vegeta replied.  
"It was nothing…" Yasa mumbled, still looking away. "We didn't even date afterwards."  
"But that's your fault, Yasa!" Raidisha scolded. "Boxas would have totally asked you out that night if you hadn't freaked him out so much! That's the only reason he went back to Yamchala."  
"Freaked him out?" Bulma looked at Yasa. "What does she mean?"  
"She means Boxas can't handle a little argument." Yasa answered bluntly.  
"We had an argument on _prom night_?" Bulma gasped.  
"Not us." Yasa replied.  
"Huh?" Bulma blinked.  
"Yasa got into an argument with some other girls… and she kind of went a little crazy." Nanapa explained.  
"Yeah, it was like the prom night in Carrie! Boxas got totally freaked out!" Raidisha said.  
"Shut up, guys! It's not like I killed anyone!" Yasa protested.  
"Only because I stopped you." Karita replied.  
"You didn't stop me! I chose to calm down on my own!" Yasa argued.  
"Yasa…" Karita looked at her. "You're a liar."  
" _ **Grrrr**_ …" Yasa growled.

Bulma turned to Vegeta, glaring at him angrily.  
"Vegeta! Trust you to ruin my prom night! You're such a jerk!" She yelled.  
"What! I wasn't even at your stupid prom night!" Vegeta snapped. "What the hell Bulma – you're the one that said what happens in their universe isn't anything to do with what happens in ours!"  
"That was different! That was when they were arguing over Nappa and Raditz dying – this is _prom night_ we're talking about! It's like the most important night in a person's life!" Bulma exclaimed.  
"No Bulma, it's really not." Vegeta growled.

Raidisha grinned at Bulma brightly.  
"Bulma, if you think that's bad you should hear what being in high school with Yasa was like. She totally bullied you!"  
"What?" Bulma gasped. Yasa reddened.  
"No I didn't…"  
"Raidisha, maybe you shouldn't –"  
" _ **Shut up Vegeta**_!" Bulma interrupted her husband. She looked at Raidisha. "Tell me."  
"Well…" Raidisha started to recall just a few instances of Yasa and Boxas' time together in high school.

 _It was a during a math exam when Yasa leaned over to Boxas, who was sitting at the desk next to her.  
"Pssst! Boxas! I need you to tell me the answer!" She whispered.  
"What? Yasa, shut up! You're gonna get us thrown out of the test!" Boxas growled.  
"Come on, just tell me!" Yasa replied.  
"Okay fine – which answer do you need?" Boxas asked, giving in to shut her up.  
"All of them." Yasa said.  
"What! Yasa, I can't tell you –"  
"Boxas!" The teacher roared. "No talking! You are disqualified!" Boxas gritted his teeth in anger._

 _It was in the school corridor when Yasa called out to Boxas._  
 _"Boxas!" She caught up to him. "I need you to do my homework!" She said and dropped a pile of books into his arms._  
 _"What! Why don't you do it?" Boxas growled._  
 _"Tch. I'm a princess! I don't do homework, I hire saps like you to do it for me." Yasa replied arrogantly._  
 _"Forget it Yasa!" Boxas snorted and started to hand the books back to her when Yasa suddenly held up a second set of books, giving him a wicked smirk as she did so. Boxas looked at them and realised that they were actually his homework books – she must have stolen them earlier that day._  
 _"Okay, fine. I'll just hand these in and say they're mine." Yasa grinned._  
 _"What! Give me those!" Boxas snapped and tried to grab his books off her._  
 _"No!" Yasa barked, swatting him away with her tail._  
 _"Come on Yasa! Stop being a bitch, this is totally unfair!" Boxas whined._  
 _"Look – I either hand these in as my own, or you can do my homework for me." Yasa said._  
 _"Grrrr… Alright, fine!" Boxas sighed angrily, surrendering. He started to look through Yasa's homework assignments. "Let's see what you got –_ _ **what**_ _! Yasa! This stuff is all due today! And – this class is in five minutes!"_  
 _"Yeah, you better hurry. See ya!" Yasa grinned. "Oh – and thanks!" She turned and ran away, leaving Boxas stood there seething._  
 _"Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!"_

 _It was in the playground when a group of girls were giggling and winking at Boxas as he walked past them._  
 _"Haha, at least the human girls appreciate me!" Boxas grinned to himself. Suddenly Yasa approached him._  
 _"Hey Boxas!" She greeted him._  
 _"Oh no…" Boxas sighed. "Yasa, what do you want?"_  
 _"I forgot my lunch money. Give me yours." Yasa ordered._  
 _"No! You'll just have to starve." Boxas barked and walked past her. Yasa glared after Boxas and caught up to him, fiercely grabbing his shirt._  
 _"Hey." She snarled. "Either you give it to me, or I'll pound your face in right in front of all your admirers here." She looked around as more people started to gather near the two of them. "Well look at that, Boxas. We're getting quite a crowd."_  
 _"Okay, okay!" Boxas surrendered, sweat dropping as he became increasingly more aware of the amount of witnesses that were appearing. "But – not here, okay? I don't want anyone to know what's happening so… meet me outside the canteen in ten minutes."_  
 _"You got it." Yasa nodded. She let go of him and ran away towards the canteen. Boxas looked around at the high school students that were staring at him, and blushed._  
 _"Haha. I was… just rejecting her! Like I'd go for a girl like that, right?" He sniggered to them, causing the students to smile and laugh in agreement. Meanwhile Yasa was by the canteen, listening to every word._  
 _"Grrr…" She seethed. Ten minutes later Boxas arrived with the money._  
 _"Okay, here." He said angrily and handed it to her. "You're lucky I come from a rich family otherwise –" Boxas was cut off by Yasa punching him harshly, knocking Boxas to the floor._  
 _"I'm the best girl you could ever meet!" She yelled and stormed off, leaving Boxas to lie there in agony._

After explaining Yasa and Boxas' high school relationship, Raidisha simply sat at the kitchen table, smiling brightly while Yasa blushed, not looking at Bulma.  
"Oh my God…" Bulma uttered and glared at Yasa. "Why the hell did I ever marry you!" She screamed. "You're a total bitch! You _ruined_ high school for me!"  
"Settle down Bulma, it's only high school." Vegeta frowned.  
" _Only_ high school!" Bulma yelled. "That's like the most important time in a girl's life! I can't believe you ruined it for me!" She hit him over the head as hard as she could.  
"Dammit Bulma it wasn't even me!" Vegeta snapped.  
"Tch. Whatever! I'll fix this stupid dimension traveller and you guys can get the hell out of here!" Bulma roared and stormed out of the room.  
"Thanks a lot Raidisha, now she's gonna be a bitch all day." Vegeta growled.  
"Ah stop complaining, you know you'll thank me later when you're having wild makeup sex." Raidisha grinned. "Right Yasa?"  
" _ **Shut up**_!" Yasa yelled and blasted her.


	6. DB Flashbacks - Reunited with Pipi

**Author's Note:-**  
Okay so I must apologise, I've not put as much effort into this series as I did into The Saiyans and The Saiyans Generation 2 – back when I made the girls I wrote a bunch of sketches set on Earth, which I decided to group together into Generation 3. I was really into writing the sketches at the time, but it was years ago and I never got round to making them into one continuous story; they're just a number of isolated sketches set across different times in DB/DBZ. Anyway, recently I decided to post my 'unreleased' Generation 3 sketches on here; originally I decided to write one more sketch to introduce the girls to anyone who hasn't read Generation 2, and the 'one' new sketch turned into chapters 0-3 of this fic, but… I'm afraid that's where I'll draw the line. Honestly, I haven't really got the motivation or the ideas to write any more new chapters for Generation 3, and I want to move onto Generation 4 ASAP, so from now on this fic will consist of the narrative versions of my old Generation 3 sketches, which were written around 10 years ago. Of course if I write any new sketches though, I'll put them up here – but for now I hope everybody enjoys the old stuff all the same!

P.S. Thank you so much to Luminous107 for your review – your feedback was much appreciated and made me smile a lot! I honestly considered writing more original sketches for Generation 3 just because of your review, but I'm kind of out of ideas n_n' Although if I do think of anything new, you can take the credit for it!

X

To summarise this sketch, this is the girls' version of Goku and Chichi being reunited at the World Martial Arts Tournament – I hope you enjoy it! Please leave your feedback :)

* * *

"Don't you remember?" The young man growled, glaring angrily at a confused-looking Karita. "You said you'd marry me!"

"I did?" Karita blinked. In the audience Yasa, Nanapa, Raidisha and Boxas were staring at the couple in shock.  
"Marry!" Raidisha cried.  
"Isn't that like a human bond?" Nanapa mumbled.  
"Who is he?" Boxas questioned.  
"I don't recognise him." Yasa answered.

Raidisha slammed her fist into the wall, causing it to crack and shatter.  
"This is an outrage!" She roared. "Some strange guy is insisting that my sister said she'd marry him and she doesn't know what to do, well I'm gonna tell her!"  
"That's right Raidisha!" Nanapa beamed.  
"Y'know sometimes, you can be a pretty honourable person." Yasa smiled.  
"Kari-chan!" Raidisha called over to her sister. "He's really cute, so go for it!"

Nanapa and Yasa fell over.  
"Raidisha!" Nanapa protested.  
"I take it back." Yasa growled.  
"Translated into _good_ big sister talk, that's knock his lights out!" Nanapa called over to Karita.  
"You don't know him! He could be a stalker, a pervert, a _**rapist**_!" Yasa screamed, getting more worked up by the second, her power level rising and falling sporadically, causing sparks to come flying out of her body. "Kill him! Pound him! Knock him dead, Kari-chan!"  
"Deep breaths, Ya-san…" Nanapa sweat dropped.  
"You're powering up." Raidisha uttered.  
"Well someone has to look after her!" Yasa pouted.  
"Hey, what's wrong with me as her guardian!" Raidisha argued.  
"Guys keep quiet for a second!" Boxas ordered.  
"Huh?" The saiyan girls uttered, looking at him. Boxas pointed to the couple on the stage.  
"Listen." He said.  
"My name is…" The unknown male began. Karita looked at him blankly, waiting for him to continue while everyone else fell silent, also listening. "… Pipi." The man uttered.

Everyone gasped in shock.  
"Pipi!" Karita cried.  
"Pipi!" Nanapa and Yasa gasped.  
"That little kid!" Yasa exclaimed.  
"Pipi? Who's that?" Raidisha frowned, looking at them.  
"You remember, Rai-chan! The Ox Queen? From seven years ago?" Nanapa replied, looking back at her. "Pipi was her son!"  
"Oh, I remember now." Raidisha nodded. "He was such a coward."  
"But since when did Karita say she would marry him?" Yasa questioned.  
"If he's the Ox Queen's son… Wow, that makes him a _**prince**_!" Raidisha exclaimed and yelled over to Karita. "Kari-chan! He's royalty, you just **have** to marry him now!"  
"No way! You can't mix royalty with ordinary people, it's practically illegal! He needs somebody his own kind!" Yasa snarled, and called to Pipi, "Hey Ox-Boy! I'm a princess, marry me instead!"  
"Ya-san you're worse than Raidisha!" Nanapa scolded. Yasa reddened, and looked at the ground in shame.  
"You didn't have to go that far…" She mumbled.  
"I wonder how much money he has…" Raidisha thought aloud.  
"Am I the only one who actually _**cares**_ about what Kari-chan wants!" Nanapa growled.  
"I care…" Boxas uttered, raising his hand sheepishly.  
"Wait a second, I care too!" Yasa barked.  
"So do I!" Raidisha protested. "If Kari-chan doesn't want t marry that stalker prince then let's kick his ass!"  
"Kill the little pervert!" Yasa roared, her ki soaring up so forcefully it blew half the audience away.  
"Dammit Yasa, control yourself!" Boxas roared, punching her.  
"You wanna be my first victim, Pretty Boy!" Yasa snarled back.  
"Um… guys?" A meek voice interrupted them.

Yasa, Boxas, Nanapa and Raidisha looked up to see Karita standing at the edge of the ring hand-in-hand with Pipi. "We decided to get married ten minutes ago." She uttered.  
"Oh." The group sweat dropped.


	7. DB Flashbacks - Yasa's Skipping School

**Author's Note:-**  
I know, another chapter with just the girls n_n' Back when I wrote Generation 3 I was crazy about the girls, but now they kind of bore me when they're not with the guys n_n' But I just wanted to publish this one, and I'll bring the boys back in the next chapter, I promise! :)

* * *

"I'm home!" Yasa announced, walking through the door.  
" _ **Yasa**_!" Nanapa's bellowing voice echoed through the house.  
"Huh?" Yasa entered the living room, and her eyes widened at who she saw. "What? Headmistress!" She gasped.  
"I'm surprised you recognise me!" Her school headmistress growled.  
"Mrs Connelly tells me you've been skipping school." Nanapa said, glaring at Yasa.  
"What? Of course I haven't, you must have the wrong girl." Yasa sweat dropped.  
"Yasa!" Nanapa roared. " **This** is why your grades are so bad! How do you expect to learn anything if you don't even go in!"  
"But I got really good grades! Look!" Yasa handed Nanapa her report card. "Straight As!"

Nanapa took hold of the card, and looked at it.  
"… Yasa." She uttered. "If you're going to try to turn Ds into As with forgery… then at least use the same coloured pen."  
"Huh!" Yasa gasped.

Suddenly Raidisha popped up out of nowhere.  
"Oh yeah Ya-san, I forgot to say, I couldn't find a black pen to match so I used a red one." She beamed.  
" _ **Baka**_!" Yasa snarled and punched her.  
"Yasa! _**This**_ is why you need to go to school! How can you get all Ds!" Nanapa scolded.  
"Hey it's not like I'm dumb or anything, I know all the answers but funnily enough I _**don't**_ speak perfect Japanese and before I came here I had no idea hira-whatever even existed!" Yasa yelled.  
"Oh right, you're a foreign student…" The headmistress mumbled. "You're Boxas' cousins aren't you? Where are you from again?"  
"Um…" Nanapa and Yasa both sweat dropped and both spoke at the exact same time,  
"China!"  
"Australia!"

The girls sat in silence for a moment, before Nanapa finally spoke up.  
"Australia? _**How**_ could you pass for an Australian?" She growled.  
"It's the only other country I know!" Yasa pouted.  
"Well if you went to school…" Nanapa replied.  
" _ **I got it**_!" Yasa snapped.

The headmistress sweat dropped.  
"So… Where are you from?" She asked.  
"China." Nanapa answered. "We're Boxas' cousins from China – on his mother's side. His uh… aunt… married a Chinese guy." She sweat dropped. The headmistress chuckled.  
"Alright then. For a moment there I thought you two were from outer space." She smiled. Yasa and Nanapa laughed nervously.  
"Yeah… How dumb." They said.

The headmistress let out a sigh.  
"Yasa, I understand you're finding it difficult to settle in, so if you like I can arrange private tutoring for you at lunch times and after school –"  
"No way! I'll just turn up to classes." Yasa growled.  
"Well, okay then." The headmistress stood up. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay Yasa?"  
"K." Yasa muttered reluctantly.  
"Oh, and can you please stop picking on other students?" The headmistress frowned.  
"They started it!" Yasa argued.  
"But Yasa… The ones you pick on are only ten years old." The headmistress said.  
"Their fault." Yasa uttered without a hint of shame.


	8. Planet Yasa

**Author's Note:-  
** Okay this is a new sketch that I thought of a couple of days ago n_n' Set in the 'present' timeline again. Enjoy! And please review :)

* * *

"So Yasa… I guess you didn't do so well in school, huh?" Bulma began, smirking slightly.  
"What? I did fine in school!" Yasa growled. Nanapa snorted.  
"Yeah, right. You skipped every class, you picked on other kids and you got Ds in everything." She argued.  
"That's not true! I got one A!" Yasa protested.  
"Oh yeah…" Nanapa said, smirking. "I forgot about that one."

Raidisha and Karita started giggling.  
"Shut up! It's not funny!" Yasa yelled at them. "How can you laugh at your home planet like that!"  
"What do you mean?" Vegeta frowned.  
"When Yasa was in school, she got a homework assignment to write a factual article about something in her life…" Nanapa explained. "Yasa wrote about Planet Yasa, and she got her very first A. The teacher said her grammar was terrible…" She smirked. "But she thought Yasa deserved an A for having such a vivid imagination."  
"It… It wasn't my imagination!" Yasa seethed, shaking in anger. "I told that stupid bitch at the time – Planet Yasa is _**real**_!" She glared at Nanapa. "She might have believed me if you and Boxas hadn't denied it!"  
"We had no choice!" Nanapa protested. "They would have kicked you out of school if they found out you were an alien!"  
"They kicked me out anyway!" Yasa argued.  
"That was for bad behaviour." Nanapa replied.  
"Really?" Raidisha uttered. "I thought it was for being dumb."  
" _ **Shut up**_!" Yasa snarled, and fired a ki blast at Raidisha.

Bulma started laughing.  
"It's not funny Bulma, Planet Vegeta was **not** a joke." Vegeta growled. Bulma blushed and lowered her eyes.  
"I… never said it was…" She mumbled. Vegeta and Yasa simply glared at her.  
"Hm…" Karita looked at Vegeta. "Hey – so I guess Planet Yasa couldn't come back in this universe either, right? Did Raditz make that wish too?"  
"What wish?" Vegeta frowned. "Planet Vegeta can't be wished back because it's been too long since its destruction."  
"Oh, really?" Karita replied, as if this was new information to her.  
"Wow… Raidisha, it looks like you really did waste a wish." Nanapa said. Raidisha blushed.  
"Too bad I guess…" She sweat dropped.  
"Waste a wish?" Bulma looked at them in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

Yasa suddenly clenched her fists and gritted her teeth in anger, her ki steadily rising as she became more and more enraged.  
"Raidisha…" She seethed. "Why don't you tell them? Tell them that even if the dragon could bring back a planet from that long ago… why _our_ planet could never be revived."  
"Ahhh, come on." Raidisha said, smiling nervously. "That's a boring story –"  
" _ **Tell them**_!" Yasa roared.  
"They wouldn't understand…" Raidisha mumbled.  
"Yeah…" Nanapa nodded. "Yasa, you're just going to upset Vegeta –"  
"You're only saying that because you backed her up!" Yasa barked. Nanapa blushed and looked away.  
"Well…" She uttered sheepishly.  
"It was self-preservation, Yasa!" Raidisha insisted. "I have to look out for myself you know – you would have done the same thing!"  
" _ **No**_! No I wouldn't have, Raidisha!" Yasa snarled. "Even if it meant I would die in the most painful way imaginable I would _**never wish for that**_!"  
"You're only saying that because you're the princess." Raidisha pouted.  
"I am not!" Yasa screamed. She suddenly turned super saiyan and fired at Raidisha, causing the weaker being to wail.  
"Kari-chan! Help me!" Raidisha cried and ducked behind Karita. Karita sweat dropped.  
"Yasa… She already said she was sorry." She uttered.  
"No she didn't!" Yasa growled.  
"Oh. …" Karita looked at Raidisha. "I can't help you." She stated, and stepped aside to allow Yasa access to her.  
"What! Some sister you turned out to be! You're supposed to protect your family, you know!" Raidisha yelled.

Vegeta shook his head in confusion.  
"Guys what are you talking about?" He frowned, and looked at Yasa. "What happened to Planet Yasa? What did she do to it!"  
"Nothing! It was Frikiza, you know that! Planet Yasa was already gone when you met us, Vegeta!" Raidisha protested.  
"So what's the problem?" Vegeta asked.  
"The problem is…" Yasa began. "That even if Planet Vegeta could ever be wished back, Planet Yasa can't be because a few years ago Raidisha summoned the eternal dragon and wished that Planet Yasa would _never_ be revived!"

Bulma and Vegeta stood there with wide eyes, staring at Raidisha in shock.  
"See. He looks pissed off now – way to go, Yasa!" Raidisha scolded. "You really know how to break an innocent guy's heart –"  
" _ **Shut up**_!" Yasa screamed. Enraged, she suddenly jumped at Raidisha and started to strangle her. "I swear to God I will kill you right now with my own hands!"  
"K-Karita…" Raidisha choked. "Help me!"  
"Yasa!" Karita gasped and tried to pull Yasa off her. "Stop it!"  
"Get off me, Karita!" Yasa snapped, smacking Karita away.

Vegeta stared at Raidisha, his body trembling in rage.  
"Why… Why the hell did you wish for that, Raidisha!" He roared.  
"It –" Raidisha broke away from Yasa with Karita's help. "It was Yasa's fault!" She protested.  
" _My_ fault!" Yasa gasped.  
"Yeah! If you weren't so selfish I never would have had to make that wish!" Raidisha argued.  
"Raidisha… stop it…" Yasa hissed, shaking.  
"It's like I said to you at the time," Raidisha continued. "If Planet Yasa ever came back you would go on living the life of luxury as a princess, bossing people around and getting everyone to do everything for you, making slaves of your underlings… and me? I would _be_ one of those underlings! And Nana-chan too – okay so maybe she would have a better life than me as an elite, but she'd still be nothing more than a dog to you and your mother – just another nobody servant to do whatever you wanted, whenever you wanted."  
"Yeah…" Nanapa nodded in agreement. "Yasa, your mother treated me like crap! And I was one of her favourites!"  
"Exactly! So Nanapa and I actually had much better lives on Earth – can you really blame us for wanting to preserve it?" Raidisha reasoned.  
"That… That's your reason?" Vegeta seethed, his fists clenched and his ki rising. "Because you didn't want to serve your queen – the one person who you were _born_ to serve?"  
"I know, right!" Yasa exclaimed.  
"I – I can't believe this!" Vegeta turned super saiyan. "How dare you –"  
"I can kind of see their point…" Bulma mumbled.  
"What!" Vegeta and Yasa both cried out, staring at her.

Bulma looked at them.  
"Well… Guys, it doesn't seem all that fair." She said. "You saiyans worked together when you were with Frieza and Frikiza, right? But the revival of Planet Yasa would mean that Yasa would go off and live the perfect life, while Nanapa and Raidisha became her slaves, after all they'd been through together… I can see why Raidisha wouldn't want that."  
"You… You bitch!" Yasa snarled, glaring at Bulma. "You sound exactly like Boxas!"  
"But she's right, Yasa! It's just like I said at the time – I don't deserve to become your slave, after all we've been through together!" Raidisha frowned.  
"And like _I_ said at the time, I wouldn't make you my slave!" Yasa argued. "If Planet Yasa ever did come back I wouldn't force you two to come with me – I'd let you stay on Earth if that's what you really wanted!"  
"Well… You should have said that before I made the wish." Raidisha shrugged.  
"I didn't think I had to! I didn't know you were going to make that wish!" Yasa protested.  
"Well I could be hurt by that in itself! How long have we been friends now Yasa? And you _still_ don't know me? What a bitch!" Raidisha growled.  
"Raidisha, stop talking to me." Yasa ordered. " **Seriously** stop talking before I cut open your throat."  
"Huh?" Raidisha blinked. "Yasa, what's wrong? You seem so mad?"  
"Well can you blame her? You destroyed her planet!" Vegeta yelled.  
"Oh come on Vegeta, be fair." Nanapa replied. "Frikiza destroyed Planet Yasa. Raidisha just danced on its grave."  
"Good analogy." Raidisha beamed.  
"Thanks!" Nanapa smile back.  
" _ **Grrrrrr**_ …" Vegeta and Yasa both snarled.

Raidisha let out a sigh.  
"I don't know what you guys are so mad at me for. If you want to blame anyone, blame your parents." She said.  
"What!" Vegeta and Yasa barked.  
"Yeah." Raidisha looked at Yasa. "Your mother – and his father." She moved her eyes to Vegeta. "I'm guessing King Vegeta was kind of similar to Queen Yasa?"  
"What's your point!" Vegeta demanded.  
"Well I'm just saying… If they hadn't ruled the planets in such an unruly fashion, maybe Frieza and Frikiza wouldn't have seen the need to kill them and destroy the saiyans." Raidisha shrugged.

Vegeta and Yasa both stared at her, wide-eyed.  
"Wh-What…?" Vegeta choked.  
"Raidisha…" Yasa uttered. "You did not just say that."  
"Hey – it's not like I'm taking sides with Frikiza, or Frieza, but… If your dog bites you, do you wait for it to bite you again, or do you just put it down while you still have your hands?" Raidisha reasoned.

Vegeta and Yasa stood there in silence for a long moment, staring at her, until Vegeta finally decided to speak.  
"… Yasa…" He began. "I have a favour to ask of you…"  
"No. I want to kill her myself…" Yasa replied, instinctively knowing what he was about to say. "But I'll let you disembowel her while she's still alive."  
"Thank you." Vegeta nodded.  
"Eep!" Raidisha squealed and bolted through the door.  
" _ **Come back here**_!" Vegeta and Yasa both roared, and raced after her.


	9. Hello Raidisha

**Author's Note:-**  
So this is a very old, very daft and very un-serious sketch that I had labelled as 'Oh My Goddess', at the time I thought it had an Oh My Goddess feel to it… but I can't remember enough about the show to really say for certain now n_n' Anyway, hopefully this will be mildly amusing.

* * *

Frieza was on Planet Namek doing his general Namek things, talking nastily as Goku stood before him, with Vegeta laying barely alive nearby.

"Evil evil evil…"

Suddenly Raidisha appeared out on nowhere.  
"Hi!" She exclaimed and looked around, letting out a sigh when she still didn't recognize her surroundings after spending half an hour universe-hopping. "Darn... wrong universe again." She growled, and noticed Frieza. "Frieza-sama?"  
"No…" Frieza gasped, wide-eyed as he stared at her.  
"It is you, right?" Raidisha blinked.  
"Please not her..." Frieza whimpered.  
"Hey! Long time no see, Fri-kun!" Raidisha grinned and raced over to him. "How are you! Hey do you have any money I could borrow –"  
"Hey Goku? I've suddenly had a change of heart." Frieza sweat dropped.  
"Nani? Who's Goku?" Raidisha frowned.

Frieza started running around frantically, in a blind panic, throwing money at Vegeta.  
"Sorry about that, buy yourself a doctor," He picked up his entire empire and dumped it on Goku and the others. "Take this, and this, destroy it if you want and I'll never do a bad thing ever again just as long as you keep _**her**_ away from me!"  
"Hey! You mean me?" Raidisha wailed, hurt.  
"Aaah! She's gonna cry!" Frieza screamed. He grabbed Goku's hand and shook it desperately. "Nice meeting you Goku, see ya!" He bolted into his ship, started up the engines and within seconds Frieza was nothing more than a speck in the sky.  
"Wait! Frieza-sama!" Raidisha called after him. "... Aww." She collapsed to the floor in dismay. "He... ran away from me...?" She sniffed. "I can't believe it... after all that shopping I did for him..."  
"Hey,"

Raidisha looked up to see Goku and Krillin standing over her.  
"We just wanna say..." Krillin began.  
"Huh?" Raidisha stood up. "What?"

Goku and Krillin suddenly grabbed her and hugged her tight with anime-style tears streaming down their faces.  
" _ **Thank you**_!" They cried.  
"We love you!" Krillin exclaimed.  
"Yeah you saved our lives, how can we ever repay you?" Goku beamed.

Raidisha looked at them and started blushing.  
"Tee hee... Well maybe you handsome boys could take me out sometime..." She giggled.  
"Sure! What's your name?" Krillin grinned.  
"Call me Rai-chan." Raidisha beamed.  
"Son Goku!" Goku introduced himself.  
"That's an unusual name..." Raidisha commented.  
"Well my saiyan name is Kakarot." Goku replied, noticing her tail. "I thought there weren't any girl saiyans left?"  
"Kakarot?" Raidisha repeated, then silently though to herself, _"It sounds like... Oh_ _ **no**_ _!"_ She collapsed to the floor again and burst into tears, devastated that this handsome young man was actually her relative. " _ **Nooooo**_!" She cried. "Otoutooooo!"


	10. Xmas Party 01 - The Guest List

**Author's Note:-**  
So I sort of gave up on Generation 3, because after going through more of my old sketches I didn't really like any enough to upload them, and I've been so focused on Demonic Love I haven't had time to write any fresh sketches, but... years ago I did start writing a Christmas party fic (which inspired me to write A Night Of Hell recently). I never managed to complete the fic, but seeing as it's Christmas and I actually like a lot of what's been written so far, I thought it'd be a good idea to upload as much of it as I can. So... I hope you like it! Please R&R!

* * *

In the Son house of the girls' universe, Pipi was checking the guest list for their Christmas party.  
"So that's us, the kids, Nanapa, Raidisha, Yasa, Boxas, Panties…" Pipi sighed. "And everyone else that can't fit in here. I _**told**_ you not to invite so many people, Goka!"  
"But I didn't!" Karita protested, just as Raidisha leaned back in her chair to look at Pipi, with a wide grin plastered across her face.  
"Hahaha." Raidisha beamed. Pipi glared at Karita.  
"And I told you to keep her away from people!" He barked.  
"Pi-kun, don't worry." Raidisha said, waving a hand, and she called over, "Hey, Ya-sama! Come here a second."  
"I'm going to train." Yasa answered from near the door.  
"Wait, I'll come too –"  
"In a minute, come here first." Raidisha interrupted Karita, and grabbed her.

Yasa looked over at Raidisha.  
"What is it?" She demanded.  
"Come here." Raidisha smiled.  
"Tell me now." Yasa growled.  
"No no, you have to come over." Raidisha insisted.  
"I'm not coming." Yasa said stubbornly, folding her arms.  
"Ya-sama, it's important!" Raidisha whined. Yasa hesitated, then finally let out a sigh and surrendered.  
"Fine." She uttered, approaching Raidisha. "What do you want?"  
"Can we have the party at your place?" Raidisha asked.  
" _ **Baka**_! Why couldn't you just ask me that before?" Yasa snapped.  
"I wanted to see if you'd come when I called you." Raidisha replied.  
" _ **You didn't call me**_!" Yasa screamed. She started scratching at Raidisha wildly, her face burning with anger.  
"Stop it!" Pipi barked, batting the two women away from each other. "I'm going to ask Boxas if he doesn't mind us holding the party at Capsule Corps."  
"Wait, Pi-kun!" Raidisha cried.  
" _What_?" Pipi seethed, narrowing his eyes at Raidisha.  
"Instead of bothering him, I know a place that's totally huge, even bigger than Capsule Corps!" Raidisha exclaimed.

Yasa stopped, and looked at her in confusion.  
"And if we use this place we'll get all the free food and drink we want!" Raidisha continued enthusiastically.  
"Really? Where?" Pipi blinked.  
"Does that mean I don't have to cook?" Karita asked, suddenly remembering that Pipi had made her promise to cook Christmas dinner this year.  
"Yeah! Hold on, let me phone him." Raidisha nodded. She pulled out her cell phone and dialled the number.

Within a few minutes, somewhere in the dark depths of hell, the phone of a large makeshift palace started ringing.  
 _"Hello?"_ The palace's chief occupant answered.  
"Hey, Fri-kun!" Raidisha greeted him from her home in the female world of the living.  
"Nani?" Yasa blinked, looking at her.  
"Guess what! We're all coming to your place for Christmas!" Raidisha declared.  
 _"Christmas? What's that?"_ Frieza asked from the other end of the phone.  
"You don't know what Christmas is?" Raidisha uttered. "Okay, you come to us instead!"  
" _ **Nani**_!" Yasa roared.  
"Okay, bye –"  
 _"Wait – Raidisha!"_ Frieza gasped, catching her.  
"What?" Raidisha asked.  
 _"… Should I bring some wine?"_ Frieza questioned.  
"Yeah, bring it all." Raidisha nodded, and hung up the phone. She turned to the others and grinned. "Fri-kun's coming to us for Christmas."

Yasa stood there with her arms folded and her fists clenched, shaking in rage as she spoke slowly through gritted teeth, giving Raidisha the coldest, darkest glare she had ever formed.  
"Why. Did you. Invite. **Him**?"  
"Good point… After what he did to King Vegeta…" Raidisha mumbled.  
"Oh, so you remembered, did you?" Yasa seethed.  
"One moment!" Raidisha said and started dialling again while Yasa muttered something offensive in saiyan.

Raidisha smiled as she spoke into the phone.  
"Hi, Vegeta?"  
" _ **Nani**_!" Yasa shrieked.  
"We're having a Christmas party over here, do you wanna come?" Raidisha spoke. "… … Uh huh. … … On Monday. Mm. Okay, see ya then!" She hung up.  
"Please don't tell me you just invited King Vegeta." Yasa growled.  
"Don't worry. I won't." Raidisha winked. Yasa let out a groan.  
"Raidisha… Why?" She whined.  
"If we get bored, we can make them fight." Raidisha replied.  
"Ooo, good idea! Cheap entertainment!" Nanapa grinned, walking into the room just in time to catch the conversation.  
"It's a shame I'm not that simple… Maybe if I was I could have fun all the time too." Yasa sighed.  
"Yasa…" Karita put a warm hand on Yasa's shoulder and offered her a supportive smile. "Don't worry about it." She said. Yasa looked at her in confusion.  
"Don't worry?" She frowned.  
"Since it's Christmas, I'll share some of my simplicity with you." Karita nodded. Yasa shook a little, the exploded into a series of vicious attacks as she screamed,  
" _ **Baka**_!"

Meanwhile in hell, Frieza once again answered the phone.  
"Hello?"  
 _"Hi – what are you wearing to the Christmas party?"_ King Vegeta's voice came from the other end of the phone.  
"I don't know… What are you wearing?" Frieza replied.  
 _"I'm not sure – is it a casual party or formal?"_ King Vegeta asked.  
"I only spoke to Raidisha and she didn't say anything…" Frieza uttered. "Let me ask her – I'll call you back."  
 _"Okay."_ King Vegeta nodded, and Frieza hung up.

King Vegeta waited for a few minutes, then his phone started to ring.  
"Hello?" He answered.  
 _"They're all wearing Christmas outfits."_ Frieza said.  
"What's that?" King Vegeta frowned.  
 _"She said it's a red outfit."_ Frieza replied.  
"Red…?" King Vegeta repeated. "That's good, I look good in red."  
 _"Mm, so did your wife."_ Frieza purred. King Vegeta smirked.  
"Yeah, I know." He said. "She had this red corset… actually I think it was the only red thing she had apart from her cape."  
 _"Oh yeah, the cape as well. I forgot about that."_ Frieza uttered.  
"What?" King Vegeta blinked.  
 _"Um… See you at the party!"_ Frieza squealed.  
"Wait –" King Vegeta cried, but Frieza hung up before he could speak another word.


	11. Xmas Party 02 - Christmas Lobster

"I'll get it!" Raidisha called as there was a knock on the door to Capsule Corps. She opened it to see King Vegeta standing there in a devil outfit.  
"Hello." He said.  
"… … Did you come as Mr. Spock?" Raidisha questioned, staring at him.  
"You said a red outfit." King Vegeta shrugged.  
"Right… Okay!" Raidisha beamed, and raced into the living room. "Hey everyone! Grandpa Vegeta's here! And he looks stupid!"  
" _ **What**_!" King Vegeta roared angrily. Hey!" He raced after her.

At that moment the doorbell rang again.  
"I'll get it!" Karita called, and answered the door. "Huh?" She blinked in confusion when she saw Frieza standing there before her, dressed in a lobster outfit.  
"I brought wine." Frieza stated, and handed Karita a set of keys. "In the van. Be careful when you open the door." He walked past her. Karita watched him go, and blushed.  
"Christmas lobster…" She uttered quietly.

Meanwhile in the living room, King Vegeta was discussing his clothing with Yasa.  
"So this isn't the right outfit?" He questioned.  
"No…" Yasa sighed.  
"But keep it on anyway." Raidisha said.  
"Why?" King Vegeta asked.  
"It looks sexy." Raidisha replied, and winked at him.  
"… Really?" King Vegeta smirked.  
"Hey, she's too young for you!" Yasa barked, glaring at King Vegeta.  
"Right." Nanapa grinned, and took hold of King Vegeta's arm. "He needs someone more his own age."  
 _"Ew."_ King Vegeta thought to himself. "I'm not available –"

At that moment Frieza walked in.  
"Where do you keep the drinks?" He asked. Yasa looked over at him, and burst out laughing.  
"Look! Fri-kun's come as Sebastian!" She exclaimed.  
"So does that make Zarbon Ariel?" Raidisha laughed.  
"Yeah," Yasa smirked, nudging her. "And Dodoria can be Flounder!" She grinned, and they both continued laughing.  
"What's so funny?" Frieza frowned.  
"Neither of you two have the right idea." Nanapa said, patting his lobster head. "You're just lucky this place has spare outfits."  
"This isn't the right outfit?" Frieza blinked.

Raidisha approached Frieza and took hold of his claw.  
"Come this way, Fri-kun…" She giggled, and led him and King Vegeta out of the room.  
"Why did she have to do that?" Yasa frowned. "I think that childish outfit suited Fri-kun." She said, and Nanapa sniggered.

Karita approached Yasa and Nanapa, her cheeks still slightly dark.  
"Did you see it – the Christmas lobster?" She asked.  
"Yeah." Yasa nodded.  
"Christmas…" Karita mumbled, blushing.  
"Kari-chan, we saw it." Nanapa stated.  
"Christmas lobster!" Karita squealed, and turned bright red.

At that moment the doorbell rang again.  
"Answer that." Yasa ordered, and poured cold water over Karita's head. "And calm down."  
"Hey!" Karita snapped, turning super saiyan to dry herself off. "What was that for!"  
"There we go." Yasa said, and turned Karita around. "Doorbell."

Karita spun back round and frowned at Yasa.  
"Everyone I invited is already here!" She argued.  
"So is everyone I invited!" Yasa replied.  
"Then who else invited people?" Karita questioned. Yasa paused for a moment, then looked at Nanapa.  
"I'm not asking her." Nanapa growled.

XXXXX

"Come in, there's plenty of room in here. Help yourselves to food and drink." Raidisha beamed as she ushered people into the room. Meanwhile Yasa, Karita and Nanapa all stood there and watched with wide eyes as the entire male universe walked into the room.  
"Un… believable." Yasa uttered.  
"And she didn't tell _anyone_?" Nanapa gasped.  
"Of course she didn't." Yasa growled.  
"We're gonna run out of food." Karita said, looking at the guests with a worried expression on her face.


	12. Xmas Party 03 - Mistletoe

**Author's Note:-**  
I wasn't going to continue this... I was going to post up what I had of the Christmas party, but when it go no hits I sort of got demotivated and decided not to bother... But I do want to move onto Generation 4, so I'll keep at this one _ I won't write anything new, but I'll put up what's already written at least. If you read it, please review :)

* * *

"Mistletoe!" Raidisha exclaimed, leaping up.  
"Mistletoe?" King Vegeta blinked.  
"What's mistletoe?" Frieza asked.  
"It's a Christmas tradition, anyone that stands underneath it has to kiss." Raidisha explained. She held a piece of mistletoe above Karita and Pipi, and Karita smiled and kissed Pipi's cheek, causing him to blush slightly.  
"Raidisha, put that away." Yasa growled.  
"Nani?" Raidisha blinked. "I was going to hold it above you and Fri-kun –"  
"You were, were you." Yasa snarled, strangling her.  
"Yasa-sama, ignore her." Nanapa said, taking the mistletoe. She held it above Nappa and Raditz, and smirked. "Dare you."  
"Is this some kind of confession?" Raditz replied, smirking back.  
"Huh!" Nanapa gasped, and Raditz burst out laughing.  
"Hey!" Nanapa barked, grabbing him. "Was that some kind of insult, you little punk!"  
"Hmm…?" Yasa uttered, looking up.  
"Oh cool, a fight!" Raidisha grinned, breaking out of Yasa's loosened grasp. "Kill that little squirt, Nana-san!" She cheered.  
"Fuck you…" Raditz growled.

XXXXX

Later into the evening, Frieza and Yasa were deep into an argument.  
"That's right! I said _**old – man**_!" Yasa snarled.  
"What!" Frieza gasped. "How dare you – I'm not that much older than you!"  
"Haha, Fri-kun. You don't think Ya-san's too young for you?" Raidisha smirked, and nudged him. "So you do want to marry her after all!"  
"What!" Frieza cried. "No, I –" He was suddenly cut off by Yasa punching him.  
"Pervert, why the hell would I want to marry you!" She screamed.  
"Believe me, you can do a _**lot**_ worse than me." Frieza growled.  
"Hey! Keep away from her! Nobody can marry Yasa-sama without _my_ approval!" Nanapa huffed.  
"So you don't think she's good enough for _me_ , owner of most of the universe, but you're perfectly happy to let her marry someone who is named after **underwear**?" Frieza snarled.  
"Hey, have you got something to say about him!" Yasa snapped.  
"Well it's not just one thing I have to consider." Nanapa explained. "I need to see how Yasa-sama feels about him too."  
"Right! Same with Kari-chan." Raidisha nodded, smiling. "They have to be happy with the guy too."  
"What?" Nanapa frowned, looking at her. "You let Kari-chan marry Pi-kun just because he was a prince."  
"Haha, well some other things are important too…" Raidisha laughed nervously.  
"He's a prince?" Frieza blinked  
"He is _**not**_ a prince!" Yasa argued. "If he was a prince that would make her a princess and she's **not** a princess!"  
"What? But Pi-kun's mother is a queen, so he has to be a prince!" Raidisha protested.  
" _ **She's not a queen**_!" Yasa yelled. "She _was_ a queen of some mountain years ago, but the mountain isn't there anymore so she's queen of nothing so she's **not** a queen and he's **not** a prince!"  
"Whereas you, you're princess of an entire planet…" Frieza said with a smirk.  
"And whose fault is that, Barney-chan!" Yasa's roared, strangling him.  
"Frikiza's!" Frieza choked.

He broke away from Yasa, coughing, and glared at her. "What does it have to do with me!"  
"Right, you're innocent in your universe too?" Yasa argued, glaring back.  
"I was just pointing out the truth…" Frieza mumbled. Meanwhile Raidisha was watching the two of them.  
"Hmm…" She mused, and turned to Nanapa. "Hey, I think Ya-sama and Fri-kun would actually make a cute couple."

Yasa and Frieza suddenly stopped dead and stared at her.  
"… What?" They uttered.  
"You were thinking that too? They're a good match!" Nanapa agreed.  
"Totally!" Raidisha grinned.  
"Would you mind explaining yourselves?" Frieza hissed. "Before I kill you?"  
"What do you mean?" Yasa demanded, glaring at Raidisha and Nanapa.  
"Well…" Raidisha looked at them. "Whenever you two are together you never do anything but insult each other and say how worthless the other one is. And you could both do with being brought down a peg or two, so I think you'd be good for each other."  
"You could help bring each other down!" Nanapa exclaimed. She looked at Raidisha. "And he's a prince too."  
"Right, she'd be rich!" Raidisha beamed. "She could get a divorce from Boxas and take half of everything, then get half of Fri-kun's empire too!"  
"She'd be loaded!" Nanapa grinned.  
"Uh-huh!" Raidisha nodded with zeni signs in her eyes.  
" _ **Nobody**_ is taking my empire!" Frieza roared. He leapt at Raidisha and started to strangle her. "Why would I marry that monkey!"  
"Right, and why the hell would I marry him!" Yasa barked, also strangling Raidisha.

As Raidisha started choking, Nanapa calmly watched the scene.  
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Yasa screamed at Raidisha.  
"You are **sick**!" Frieza roared. The two of them suddenly paused, then looked at each other, awkwardly realising that they were actually on the same side.  
"Hmph!" They both huffed, and stubbornly turned away.


	13. Xmas Party 04 - I Never

Deep into the evening, Cell, Frieza, Zarbon, King Vegeta, Bardock, Raditz and Nappa were sat around in the kitchen playing I Never.  
"I never had sex with the King's wife." Raditz said, and Bardock, Nappa, King Vegeta and Frieza drank.  
"Uh, guys? You're doing it wrong." King Vegeta said. "You're only supposed to drink if you **have** done that thing."  
"… … _Ohhh_!" Bardock, Nappa and Frieza all uttered.  
"Yeah, I uh… I totally didn't get that…" Bardock said nervously, not looking at King Vegeta.  
"Thank you for enlightening me…" Frieza mumbled.  
"Huh?" Nappa blinked, not really understanding the situation as he was the only one that genuinely didn't understand the rules of the game. Cell simply smirked.

Bardock cleared his throat and moved swiftly on.  
"I never had sex with a guy." He said, and Frieza and Zarbon drank.  
"I never had sex with a girl." Zarbon countered, and Bardock, Nappa, Raditz, King Vegeta and Frieza drank.  
"I never had sex." Cell said, and everyone except him drank.  
"I never had sex with a guy and a girl at the same time." King Vegeta said. Frieza hesitated, then took a sip of his drink. Cell looked at him questionably.  
"I can't remember if it was a real girl." Frieza explained.  
"Well did it have a **penis**!" Bardock growled.  
"I have no idea, there were so many there that night!" Frieza protested.  
"Wow…" King Vegeta gasped. "I want your life."

Everyone stared at him. "No, I mean – look, I'm not _gay_." King Vegeta said. "But having so much sex you can't remember what you've had sex with? Awesome!"  
"Your Highness, you're totally right!" Bardock exclaimed.  
"Cool!" Raditz grinned.

Cell sighed.  
"I was never stupid and horny enough to envy Frieza for having so much probably-unprotected sex." He frowned, and everyone drank.  
"Yes…" Frieza smirked, his eyes glowing manically. "Glow, my pretties, glow green with envy!"

Everyone went quiet.  
"Well that was weird." Bardock stated.  
"I don't feel comfortable around you anymore, Frieza…" King Vegeta mumbled.  
"Really?" Frieza frowned. "Alright, so – I destroy your planet; I steal your son; I screw your wife and _now_ you do not feel comfortable around me? _Honestly_? Do you even know why you were born?"  
"He has a point, Saiyan." Cell sniggered. King Vegeta glared at him.  
"Well –"

He was suddenly interrupted by Yasa entering the room. She looked at them; her arms are folded across her chest.  
"Have I walked in on the universe's biggest inter-racial orgy?" She smirked.  
"God, I wish…" Zarbon purred, eyeing up Bardock, whose eyes widened in horror. Yasa sat down in the one empty seat, which just happened to be next to Frieza.  
"Oh God, you're not joining us are you?" Frieza groaned. Yasa glared at him.  
"What if I am?" She hissed.  
"Hey, uh – it's no girls allowed." Nappa said.  
"Exactly." Frieza sighed. "So we can't get rid of her."  
"Actually I came to replace you, Fairy!" Yasa snarled, causing Cell and the saiyans to laugh.  
"She's my daughter alright!" King Vegeta grinned.  
"Yes, the smell is uncanny…" Frieza sniped.  
"Be careful, little boy." Yasa hissed at him, while Cell watched the two of them closely.

Yasa grabbed a beer. "What's the game?" She asked.  
"I Never." Bardock answered.  
"I never… uh…" Nappa began, and then sighed shamefully. "I never made out with a girl when I was seventeen."  
"Loser." Raditz grunted, taking a swig of his drink. Yasa also drank, which caused the saiyans (aka, the straight guys) to go wide-eyed.  
"Whoa!" They cried.  
"What?" Yasa shrugged, looking at them. "We were drunk; it was only for a couple of minutes."  
"What, uh… what were you wearing?" Bardock asked.  
"What did she look like?" Raditz drooled.  
"Put your trousers back on, perverts." Yasa growled, glaring at them.  
"Don't get too excited, Boys." Frieza snorted. "The girl must have been drunk out of her skull, blind, insane, terminally ill and have absolutely no self-respect to make out with Yasa."

Yasa leapt up and stood over Frieza, glaring at him.  
"I'm _**warning**_ you!" She seethed.  
"Frieza, don't kill my fantasy." Bardock growled.  
"Hmph!" Frieza grunted, and pushed Yasa back down. "Calm yourself, Dear."  
"Calm myself! You think this is me not calm?" Yasa barked.  
"Good God." Cell said.  
"What?" Frieza blinked.

Cell raised his beer bottle and took a turn,  
"I never sat next to a feisty saiyan princess for barely five seconds before there was more love-hate sexual tension around two chairs than there is in Satan and Lilith's bedroom on Halloween."  
" _Ooooooo_!" The male saiyans exclaimed.  
"Wh-what!" Frieza gasped.  
"What the **fuck** are you trying to say? I'm married!" Yasa yelled.  
"Well I'm not married." Frieza said. "But –"  
"Yes you are; I've met your wife." Yasa frowned. "Where do you think your kid came from?"  
"I have a child?" Frieza gasped, his eyes widening. Yasa sighed.  
"Is your drinking really that bad?" She asked.  
"It's not the alcohol. He's just a heartless tyrant that doesn't care about anyone except himself." Bardock growled.  
"All this talk of children…" King Vegeta mumbled. "Maybe I should start a family."  
"You have, Sire…" Bardock sighed helplessly.  
"Yes, what a worthwhile thing that was…" Frieza said with a smirk. "How's the family, Vegeta?"  
"A super saiyan actually, how about yours?" King Vegeta snarled. "I hear your wife isn't too quick on the uptake."  
"Well of course she isn't, she's my wife." Frieza replied. "Women should be attractive and dumb, and obey the orders of a man."  
"Oh, you sexist pig!" Yasa yelled.  
 _"He has a point though…"_ Bardock thought to himself.  
"What kind of loser marries an airhead?" Yasa snarled.  
"Well, your husband did." Frieza smirked. Yasa glared at him.  
"Oh really? I'm much smarter than you!" She barked.  
"Oh… I don't think so." Frieza said.  
"What's Galick Gun and Lord Frieza multiplied by five?" Yasa growled.  
"I believe it's… 'Oh, look. We've killed that awful Frieza twice now but here he is again'." Frieza answered, and smirked. "And again." He took Yasa's drink off her. "And again." He drank her drink. "And again." And he handed Yasa back her drink. Yasa simply glared at him, and snarled. "It's a shame, isn't it?" Frieza smirked.  
"Good job killing Goku." Yasa sniped.  
"Well I was just going to say the same to you." Frieza replied, causing Yasa to snarl louder.  
"I can't watch…" Cell groaned, covering his eyes. "Why am I the only one seeing this!"  
"Why can't you just accept the fact that I will always own the saiyans?" Frieza sneered. "Everybody else has. Stupid girl."  
"I am not stupid!" Yasa snapped.  
"What is the first digit of pi?" Frieza asked. Yasa flinched and paused, then realised she didn't know the answer.  
"… What kind of a question is that?" She growled.

At that moment Karita entered the room.  
"Did somebody say 'pie'?" She beamed.  
"No Karita, they didn't!" Yasa gasped, her eyes widening. "Drop it _now_!"  
"Oh, this is too good…" Frieza smirked. "Karita? Can I ask you a question?"  
"Sure! What is it?" Karita smiled.  
"Do you know what the first digit of pi is?" Frieza asked.  
"The first digit of pi…?" Karita repeated.  
"Karita, please! For the honour of saiyans everywhere do not answer that question!" Yasa cried.  
"No – it's okay Yasa, I got it." Karita said.  
"I really don't think you have…" Yasa groaned. Karita looked at Frieza.  
"The first digit of pi is pastry!" She declared, brimming with confidence.

Frieza, Zarbon and Cell all burst out laughing, while the rest of the saiyans hid their faces in shame.  
"I _told_ you…" Yasa seethed.  
"Was that wrong?" Karita sweat dropped.  
"Saiyans! What stupid creatures." Zarbon snorted.  
"Where the hell have you sprung from!" King Vegeta barked, suddenly becoming aware of Zarbon's presence in the room.  
"Hmph!" Zarbon grunted. "I was making the scenery look beautiful."  
"Bender." Bardock sniped.  
"Listen –" Yasa advanced on Frieza. "She hit her head when she was younger! She thinks she's a human, she wasn't raised with us – she does not represent saiyans!"  
"I don't know." Frieza said, looking Yasa up and down. "Stupid, disobedient, overconfident, unattractive… I think she forms a perfect example."  
"You take that _back_." Yasa hissed, leaning into him.  
"No." Frieza said with a smirk.  
"I'm warning you." Yasa seethed.  
"I know you are." Frieza shrugged. "And I'm not threatened."

Yasa uttered a low growl and stared fiercely into his eyes, piercing death into his soul. Frieza simply stared back. Calm, smooth and fearless. Yasa held her face just inches away from his, so close that Frieza could feel her angry, steady breaths against his skin. Meanwhile, everyone else was watching.  
"This is…" Bardock uttered, and swallowed. "Wrong."  
"So intense…" Raditz gasped, as Nappa gulped in fear. Zarbon watched angrily, gritting his teeth while Cell simply waited…  
"Huh…?" Karita blinked as Frieza placed his hand on Yasa's arm, drawing blood. Yasa simply smirked.  
"You really think you can hurt me…?" She challenged, and leaned into him. "Go ahead. Try."

Frieza smirked darkly, and started to form a small and deadly ki ball on his free fingertip. Yasa didn't back down, and challengingly bore her fangs at him.  
" _Squee_!" Karita squealed. Frieza met Yasa's eyes, and raised his finger…  
"Hey!"  
"Huh?" Yasa uttered, looking up.

She saw Boxas standing in the doorway, glaring at them.  
"What's going on here?" He growled. Frieza let go of Yasa as she pulled away, and smirked.  
"What a hero." He sniped, and looked at Yasa. "Walking in at just the right moment to save you, aren't you lucky?"  
"You're the lucky one." Yasa growled, and went over to Boxas.

Meanwhile Zarbon, Cell, Karita, King Vegeta, Bardock, Raditz and Nappa had been watching the Frieza-Yasa scene intently, and they finally breathed and relaxed.  
"Hmph! He would have just killed her anyway." Zarbon snorted.  
"Wishful thinking, Eve…" Bardock replied.  
"I would have!" Frieza protested.  
"Of course, Frieza, of course." Cell smirked.  
"Oh – I'll prove it to you!" Frieza barked.

At that moment Raidisha entered the room. "I don't even like girls that much anyway, and especially not saiyan girls." Frieza growled. "Dirty creatures…"  
"That's what's good about 'em." Bardock said with a smirk. Raidisha grinned and posed for him, and Bardock winked at her. Zarbon looked at Bardock in disgust.  
"Isn't that your daughter, you filthy rodent?" He snorted.  
"I don't have a daughter, Princess, just two sons." Bardock replied, and pointed at Raidisha. "As far as I'm concerned, that little piece is nothing to do with me."  
"That's what I like to hear!" Raidisha exclaimed. "I've only been in this room two seconds and already I'm getting offers."  
"Well don't think it's over yet, Frieza hasn't had his say." Cell smirked. "He's into saiyan girls at the moment. "  
" _ **I am not**_!" Frieza yelled.  
"I thought you were going to prove it." Cell challenged.  
"I would not give you the satisfaction." Frieza pouted.  
"Saiyan girls…?" Karita uttered. "Well you should know that Yasa and I are both married." Cell burst out laughing.  
Oh, how brilliant!" He exclaimed. "I never knew it could happen – but she's actually worse than Goku!"

Frieza uttered a low growl, still annoyed about being accused of liking saiyans.  
"Oh!" Raidisha looked at Frieza. "You like Yasa-sama? She's pretty untouchable, y'know. Want me to give you tips?"  
"Hey!" Boxas barked. Yasa smacked Raidisha over the head.  
"Don't you **dare** say that again!" She roared.  
"I _**do not**_ like her!" Frieza screamed.  
"Yeah, yeah…" Cell said tauntingly.  
"Fine! I will prove it just to spite you!" Frieza barked. "Zarbon."  
"Yes?" Zarbon answered.  
"Do you want to go to some politically correct Earth country and get one of those civil marriages?" Frieza asked.

Zarbon's jaw dropped.  
"Wh-What?" He choked, while everyone else's eyes widened in shock.  
"What the…?" Yasa gasped.  
"Did Frieza just…?" Karita mumbled.  
"Frieza just _**proposed**_ to someone!" Raidisha declared. "I never thought I'd see this! Zarbon – do you accept?"  
" _Of course_!" Zarbon wailed.  
" **Wow**!" Raidisha grinned. "I never thought I'd see that either!"  
"What! Why!" Frieza demanded.  
"L-Lord Frieza!" Zarbon cried, with tears falling from his big love-heart eyes. "I can't believe it! I've been your casual fuck-buddy boyfriend for as long as I can remember, but I never thought it'd get serious – I mean, I thought about it sometimes but I never imagined…" He grabbed hold of Frieza and squeezed him tight. " _ **I love you**_!"  
"Eugh!" Frieza gagged, pushing Zarbon away. "Well I don't love you! Can't you just settle for being a gold-digger?" Zarbon uttered a loving sigh.  
"You know me so well, Lord Frieza." He smiled. "Money always was more important than love…"  
"Good. Then you can be my token attractive partner." Frieza said.

Yasa looked at Zarbon and sneered.  
"I see 'token', but not 'attractive'." She sniped.  
"How dare you!" Zarbon yelled. "I'm much more beautiful than you are!"  
"You're more of a woman than me, and that's not a compliment." Yasa growled.  
"To you, no." Zarbon snarled.  
"Hmph!" Yasa huffed, and turned away.  
"I can't believe Frieza's getting _**married**_!" Raidisha cried. "To someone with a tiny bit of brain!"  
"What! Why is that so hard to believe?" Frieza argued. "I own half of the universe; I can get whatever I want; I practically _breathe_ money…"  
"And what a hideous wedding that will be." Yasa spat. "I hope you don't mind if I don't come."  
"Of course not." Frieza growled. "I don't want any saiyans there, stealing all the food and wine…"  
"There'll be _**wine**_?" Raidisha gasped, and threw her arms around Karita and Yasa. "Count us in!" She beamed. "Nana-san too!"  
"No, you're not invited!" Frieza yelled. "I don't want a single one of you creatures to set foot on my planet again!"  
"Hm…" Yasa mused. "Food and wine? Maybe I can spare a couple of hours to go."  
"What!" Frieza barked. "No –"  
"It's not like you can stop me. I'm so much stronger than you now." Yasa smirked. "That's what happens when you spend so many years in Hell – you get left behind while everyone else grows stronger."  
"Tell me about it…" Bardock mumbled, and took a swig of his beer. "Fuckers."  
"You just said you didn't want to go!" Frieza protested, glaring at Yasa. "You're only going because you know I don't want you there."  
"Well of course I am; I'm not doing it for some pretty photos am I?" Yasa smirked.  
"Listen – it's not my problem you got owned all throughout your childhood." Frieza growled.  
"Not your problem? It was your fault!" Yasa snapped.  
"I know, but it benefited me." Frieza shrugged. "So I still don't see how it was ever my problem."

Yasa opened her mouth to argue, when Raidisha interrupted her.  
"Fri-kun, just accept it!" Raidisha grinned. "We're going, and we're making ourselves at home." She put an arm around Frieza and raises her glass to his. "On the day of the wedding, consider yourself bankrupt!" Raidisha declared, and clinked their glasses together.  
"Sounds like fun!" Karita grinned.  
"Rai, she's learning." Yasa smirked.


	14. Xmas Party 05 - Similarities

After the game of I Never, Frieza and Zarbon were announcing their engagement.  
"Niichan is getting married? How exciting!" Frikiza grinned. "Congratulations!"  
"Frikiza, how many times have I told you before?" Frieza sighed in annoyance. "I am _not_ your big brother; we are exactly the same age!"  
"But… you've always felt like a big brother." Frikiza replied.  
"If you are going to call me anything call me 'Sensei' or 'Frieza-sama'." Frieza ordered.  
"That sounds so distant… I'll just call you Frieza." Frikiza said.  
"Fine." Frieza sighed.  
"Why do you need to call him anything?" Yasa snorted. "What's wrong with 'Hey Loser!'?"  
"Oh aren't you precious?" Frieza sniped. "Tell me – are there any saiyans laughing at that one?"  
"No, but there are plenty of icejins." Yasa smirked. "How many forms does your brother have again?"  
"Do _**not**_ go there." Frieza growled icily.  
"Oh yeah… Fri-kun and his family don't get along, right?" Raidisha said.  
"'Fri-kun' and his family get on fine, little forgotten daughter." Frieza hissed.  
"H-Hey!" Raidisha gasped, hurt.  
"Niichan! That was mean!" Frikiza scolded.  
"You're doing it again!" Frieza barked.  
"Ignore him, Raidisha." Yasa grunted. "He's just bitter because we're going to witness this absolute disaster of a wedding."  
"So don't come!" Frieza barked.  
"Oh – right, Frieza, because _**I**_ have always followed your orders." Yasa snarled.  
"Well perhaps you should." Frieza growled. "You are one of the few saiyans that never learned its place; and the others were raised by humans."

Yasa waved a hand.  
"Look at me – am I playing the world's smallest violin or am I just covering a yawn?" She sniped.  
"Well, I always knew you weren't musically gifted – or gifted at all, in fact." Frieza smirked.  
"You're right." Yasa smirked back. "I'm not special like you, Rain Man."  
"Rain Man!" Frieza barked. "How dare you – show some respect this instant!"  
"Or what?" Yasa challenged. She sat up in her chair, and turned round to face him. "You'll set your Ginyu Force on me? You'll get Zarbon to attack me with his mascara? Come on, I'm curious."  
"Niichan, just drop it…" Frikiza mumbled.  
"Me drop it?" Frieza snarled, glaring at her. "This is **your** fault for not properly educating this girl!"  
"Blaming a walking Barbie doll? How very manly of you." Yasa spat.  
"Well, I could never be as manly as you, Dear." Frieza retorted.  
"I'm incredibly womanly!" Yasa barked.

Frieza looked Yasa up and down, and snorted.  
"What exactly is your definition of a 'woman'?" He asked. Yasa stood up, her ki flaring.  
"I'm wearing a fucking skirt, aren't I!" She yelled. "Sorry I don't have as many pink thongs as you do!"  
"I'm sorry I don't eat as disgustingly as you." Frieza replied. Yasa snarled and picked up a knife.  
"You wanna see me use cutlery? Come here, I'll show you!" She growled.  
"Be careful, Yasa, you're going to harm yourself." Frieza calmly replied.  
"I'll harm **you**!" Yasa yelled, advancing on him.

Boxas once again entered the room, after overhearing the last few lines.  
"Okay, what the **hell** is going on between you two?" He demanded.  
"I already told you, **nothing**!" Yasa yelled.  
"Awfully jealous, isn't he? Whatever gave him the impression you ever had it in you to cheat?" Frieza remarked. Boxas went quiet, suddenly feeling guilty.

Frikiza smiled.  
"See, Frieza-san! You can say nice things when you want to." She beamed.  
"… What gives…?" Yasa uttered, looking at Frieza cautiously.  
"What?" Frieza asked, and looked at her innocently. "I am right, aren't I? You could not catch a bit on the side even if you wanted to."  
"You wanna bet, Lizard Boy!" Yasa screamed, digging her claws into him. "I get offers just walking outside my house, when was the last time you ever got a look off something? Other than your mirror, of course!"  
"You're looking at me now, aren't you?" Frieza snarled.  
"Yeah, thank God my body hasn't turned into stone." Yasa hissed.  
"Wh-What do you mean by that?" Frieza gasped, insulted.  
"Well, you have the tail of a snake…" Yasa smirked.  
"Are you actually comparing me to _**Medusa**_?" Frieza screamed.  
"What's wrong?" Yasa shrugged. "I thought she would be considered quite attractive on your planet."  
"Oh, you disgusting rodent!" Frieza wailed. "How the hell did you manage to find something stupid enough to marry you?"  
"Why, do you want tips?" Yasa smirked, and the two of them started bickering at a tremendous pace.

Meanwhile Boxas was watching the two of them, and growing angrier by the second.  
"What am I, some kind of loser?" He snarled. "I'm not going to stand for this!"  
"Ah – I wouldn't…" Frikiza mumbled.  
"Shut up, what's he going to do?" Boxas argued.  
"But…" Frikiza whimpered.

Boxas approached Yasa and Frieza.  
Hey!" He barked, slamming an aggressive hand onto Frieza's shoulder. Frieza froze on the spot, suddenly turning completely silent. "Keep the hell away from my wife, you hear!" Boxas yelled.  
"Do you… know what just happened there?" Frieza hissed.  
"Uh-oh…" Raidisha uttered, grinning mischievously.  
"Bad move, Sweetheart." Zarbon said to Boxas with a smirk.

Frieza turned his head slightly and looked Boxas straight in the eyes, piercing into his soul. Boxas began to weaken.  
"Uh…" He mumbled sheepishly. "I was just saying…"  
"I know. I heard." Frieza replied, and stood up.  
"Listen." Boxas uttered, backing off. "Just stick with your own wife, okay?"  
"What am I, property?" Yasa growled.  
"Let's make a deal." Frieza said, and grabbed the hand that Boxas had placed on his shoulder.  
"Deal?" Boxas blinked.  
"You never speak to me for as long as you and your _children_ live…" Frieza began, breaking Boxas' fingers, causing the man to silently howl in pain. "… And I don't rip out every one of your organs and feed them to your children – for another week."  
"Oh, that is **_it_**!" Yasa roared, her rage exploding. "You think you can come into my house and start making death threats!" She powered up. "You are getting **fried**!"

Boxas sat down, traumatised, and held his broken hand.  
 _"It's actually my house…"_ He thought to himself.  
"Just try it, Princess!" Frieza challenged.  
"Oh, I will!" Yasa barked. " _ **Galick**_ –"  
"Don't worry about it, Boxas!" Raidisha exclaimed, putting a hand on Boxas' shoulder. "They only talk so much because they're the same."  
" _What_!" Yasa screamed, suddenly halting her attack.  
" _The same_!" Frieza cried.  
"Actually… she has a point." Frikiza said.  
" _ **She does not**_!" Frieza yelled.

At that moment Karita entered the room.  
"Kari-chan!" Raidisha beamed. "Don't you think Yasa-sama and Fri-kun are similar?"  
"Yasa and Fri-kun…?" Karita repeated. She tilted her head, considering the notion. "Well… I suppose so." She smiled.  
" **What**!" Frieza cried.  
"What are you asking her for? She can't even _spell_ similar!" Yasa protested.  
"Can you?" Frieza sniped. Yasa hissed at him.

Raidisha started laughing.  
"See! You're at it again." She grinned.  
"Right!" Karita giggled. "I see it!"  
" **Huh**!" Frieza and Yasa huffed.  
"Exactly _how_ are we the same, may I ask?" Frieza growled.  
"Sure! Glad you asked." Raidisha beamed. "You're both royalty." She said.  
"You're both a little short-tempered…" Karita added.  
"Right!" Raidisha nodded. "You're both married."  
"You both have a child." Frikiza smiled.  
"Fri-kun's spoilt!" Raidisha continued. "Yasa-sama isn't really _spoilt_ , but… she's used to having people like me and Nana-san obeying her."  
"You're both stubborn!" Karita grinned.  
"Neither of you can admit it when you're wrong." Frikiza said. Raidisha laughed.  
"Ahaha, right!" She nodded. "And you both think you're better than the other!"  
"I _am_ better than her!" Frieza argued.  
"Huh! Of course you are; that's exactly why I'm still not dead." Yasa pouted, and sighed sympathetically. "Poor Frieza, you tried…"  
"Grr!" Frieza snarled.  
"See!" Raidisha slapped Boxas on the back. "Don't worry about it! They really do hate each other, but they're so similar they end up arguing for hours; neither one of them is willing to back down, and the more they argue… the more involved in arguing they get!"  
"Until someone else separates them…?" Karita uttered.  
"Precisely!" Raidisha nodded. "Whose turn is it?"

Karita went quiet, trying to think back.  
"Did I do it last time?" She asked.  
"Friki! Would you do the honours?" Raidisha grinned.  
"Oh – of course." Frikiza smiled.

She approached Yasa and Frieza, causing Yasa to lash out.  
"Get the hell away from me!" She screamed. Frieza glared at the others.  
"We are not children, you know." He snarled.  
"Well… I'm not." Yasa said.  
"Oh, are you kidding me?" Frieza snorted. "Face is, Dear, no matter how much time passes you will always be that scared little orphaned girl."  
"What did you say!" Yasa seethed, advancing on Frieza.  
"Now how can I phrase this in a way that she will understand…?" Frieza said, deliberately thinking out loud. "Oh – I know." He then spoke the rest of his words in fluent saiyan, " _Your mother is lying under Satan_."

Raidisha froze, and her eyes slowly widened as a look of horror swept across her face.  
"Uh-oh…"  
"Niichan, maybe you shouldn't have said that…" Frikiza said quietly. Karita didn't understand all of Frieza's words, and looked at Frikiza. "What did he say?" She asked sheepishly.  
"Um…" Frikiza mumbled.  
"Oh, that is it…" Yasa hissed. "Raidisha, it looks like we're not going to that wedding after all."  
"Shame…" Raidisha sighed.

Yasa's ki suddenly exploded, making the entire room shake as she turned super saiyan and glared at Frieza, whose eyes widened in fright.  
" _ **Galick**_ –"  
" _Not in the house_!" Boxas yelled.  
"Now is **not** the time, Boxas!" Yasa barked. " _Galick_ – Hey!"

She struggled violently as Karita carried her outside.  
"You're going to blow up Boxas!" Karita frowned, and dropped Yasa off in the garden.  
"Hey!" Frieza snarled, squirming as Raidisha pushed him outside.

At that moment, Cell came out to see what all the noise was about. He leaned against the doorway, watching the scene.  
"Is there a fight going on?" He asked.  
"Dammit, I've lost the moment!" Yasa growled, and glared at Frieza. "Say that again, Lizard Boy!"

Frieza bowed graciously.  
"As you wish, my princess…" He purred.  
"Wow, is he _trying_ to get himself killed?" Raidisha gasped.  
"But it's like you said… they're both so stubborn." Karita said. "I think he'd rather have her kill him than back down."

Frieza smirked at Yasa.  
"Your mother," He began. "Is in hell. Burning with Satan, and all the other little saiyan children that miss their mothers."  
"Oh, you angel." Yasa smirked. " _ **Galick gun**_!" She threw her signature attack at him, and Frieza ended up fried.  
"Kinky." Cell uttered, a little taken aback. He drank his beer, and smirked. "You're right, Frieza. You certainly have **that** saiyan under control."  
"Ugh…" Frieza groaned as he lay face-down on the ground, black. Karita approached Frieza.  
"Hey… are you still alive?" She asked softly, and knelt down beside him. "Do you want a senzu?"  
"Ah, leave him!" Raidisha said, waving her hand dismissively. "It's his own fault, right?" She kicked Frieza. "Hey, Fri-kun! We're still invited to the wedding, right?"

Karita started prodding and poking at Frieza.  
"His scales don't feel hot at all!" She gasped.  
"Hey, careful!" Raidisha laughed. "What if they fall off?"  
"Frieza…" Frikiza sighed, standing over her counterpart. "You need to learn to be nicer to people. Didn't I tell you it'd get you into trouble?"  
"I'm… fine…" Frieza breathed.

Yasa approached Frieza, and glared down at him.  
"Humph!" She grunted, and rolled him over with her foot, so that he was lying on his back. Frieza simply looked up at her angrily. "Do I get an apology?" Yasa demanded.  
"For what?" Frieza growled. "I'm just the murderer; it's her own fault she wound up in hell."  
"You don't give up, do you?" Yasa snarled, and leaned over him. "I'm going to ask you again. Do – I – get – an – apology?"  
"I don't do apologies." Frieza answered.  
"Oh well." Yasa shrugged. "Your suicide." She put a finger to his head, and smirked. "Goodnight, Sweet Prince." Then she blasted Frieza again, knocking him out cold.  
"Is he dead?" Karita gasped, her eyes widening.  
"Who cares?" Yasa growled. "Come on, I'm hungry. Let's go inside." And she walked away.  
"Hm…" Raidisha mused, considering something.  
"What?" Karita asked.

Raidisha looked at Frikiza.  
"You're an outsider, right?"  
"Outsider?" Frikiza blinked.  
"Yeah!" Raidisha nodded. "You're not a saiyan, right?"  
"No…?" Frikiza answered.  
"Based on what you've just seen, would you call saiyans 'barbarians'?" Raidisha asked.  
"Based on that…?" Frikiza sweat dropped. "I would."  
"I see…" Raidisha mumbled. She raised her fist and placed an arm around Karita. "Haha!" She exclaimed. "It's _**official**_! The lizards always lie; saiyans are warrior pacifists! Let's go and celebrate!" And she ran towards the house.  
"Um… did you understand what I was saying…?" Frikiza mumbled, confused.

Cell approached her.  
"I wouldn't worry about it." He said, and held out his beer. "Do you drink anything other than wine?"  
"No, but I've always wanted to try it." Frikiza answered, smiling at him gratefully. She took his beer, and Cell watched as she drank it. Frikiza paused, then winced. "I feel so masculine!" She squealed.  
"Well, you're still pink…" Cell replied, sweat dropping.


	15. Xmas Party 06 - How Frieza met Zarbon

Later in the evening, Frikiza was looking through Yasa and Boxas' wedding album.  
"Cute…" She smiled. "Niichan, why don't you wear a suit like this?" She said, and showed Frieza a photo.  
"Eugh." Frieza gagged. "Is that Yasa wearing white? When could she ever pull that off?"

At that moment Yasa came up behind him and yanked his head back by the horns.  
"Hey!" She barked. "One more word out of you and I'll turn you **into** a book!" She glared at Frikiza. "Put that back where you found it!"  
"Well, I didn't really find it. Someone gave it to me…" Frikiza said.  
"So give it them back." Yasa ordered.

Frikiza obediently handed the album back to Cell and Piccolo, who began to study the photos.  
"So which one are you more attracted to?" Piccolo asked.  
"Neither!" Cell groaned. "It's no use."  
"Same here…" Piccolo sighed.  
"Ew!" Yasa gagged in disgust. "Okay, can somebody please turn these two into mammals so they know what it's like to be aroused by something?"  
"Delicately phrased." Frieza remarked, causing Yasa to shoot him a nasty glance.  
"So…" Cell began. "Frieza, in all seriousness – would you find Yasa attractive?" Frieza shot him a death glare. "I didn't mean it that way!" Cell insisted. "But you're attracted to women, aren't you?"  
"Some women…" Frieza shrugged. "It depends. I'm a lot pickier with women than I am with men."  
"You're attracted to both?" Piccolo blinked.  
"Yes, I'm bisexual." Frieza answered.  
"Pah!" Bardock snorted. "Typical. Even your sexuality wants everything!"  
"Well some of us can get what we want, _super saiyan_." Frieza said with a smirk.  
"And some of us can't, 'super saiyan slayer'." Bardock retorted.  
"My, that was awfully quick of you!" Frieza sniped. "Have you been practising on your own or have you always had a talent for thinking of comebacks that contain words you've just heard?"

Frikiza smiled at Frieza, just as Zarbon was entering the room.  
"Niichan… do you find me attractive?" She asked.  
"You're a female _me_ , of course I do!" Frieza replied.  
"Do you remember Zara-san? What about her?" Frikiza asked. Frieza paused for a moment, considering.  
"Yes, she is rather beautiful…" He uttered.  
"Well of course she is, Lord. She's me." Zarbon replied arrogantly. He looked at Frikiza. "Aren't you bisexual too?"  
"Well…" Frikiza began, trying to figure it out. "I think a lot of girls are pretty, but… I don't really like them in that way."  
"See!" Raidisha exclaimed. "That's how you two are different! Friki is content with how things are, but Fri-kun always wants more!"  
"That's right!" Karita nodded. "He's never happy."  
"Well, why **should** I settle for less?" Frieza argued.

Raidisha patted him on the back.  
"Because you're too small to achieve more!" She grinned.  
" **What**!" Frieza roared, causing Yasa to snigger.  
"I don't know what you're laughing at." Frieza growled. "I'm taller than you."  
"I'm a girl!" Yasa protested.  
"I'm not so sure." Frieza smirked.  
"Well you're not attracted to me, are you Asslover?" Yasa snarled.  
"The day I find you attractive is the day I find a _saiyan_ attractive." Frieza hissed.  
"Really?" Frikiza uttered. "But Yasa-san has very pretty eyes…"  
"Maybe, but it's not the eyes that matter!" Raidisha exclaimed. "Compare us!"

She squeezed Yasa's chest, causing Yasa to go wide-eyed. "Yasa-sama is only a B cup, but us Son girls are C-C-C!" Raidisha grinned.  
"Ah… 'Son girls'?" Karita repeated. "You're a Son too?"  
"Ssh! Our saiyan name is secret!" Raidisha said.  
"Why?" Karita sweat dropped.

Yasa pushed Raidisha away.  
" _Get the hell off my chest_!" She screamed.  
"Sorry Yasa-sama, I was just showing everyone how small they are." Raidisha said.  
"They're not small!" Yasa barked. Karita looked at Yasa's chest and her eyebrows rose in surprised.  
"I never realised they're not the same as mine." She uttered, and took off her shirt.  
"K-Karita…" Yasa choked, wide-eyed.  
"Let's compare!" Karita beamed, and reached for Yasa's shirt.  
"No!" Yasa yelled, jumping away.  
"Wow, this is kind of hot…" Bardock uttered, staring at the girls.  
"Yeah… I wish to God she wasn't my sister…" Raditz mumbled.  
"She's _not_!" Bardock growled.

Meanwhile Cell was watching Karita and Yasa, and gulped nervously.  
"I think I'm developing a sexuality…" He whimpered.  
"Really?" Piccolo looked at him. "Will you let me borrow it?"  
"Sure." Cell nodded, and shook his hand.

Yasa suddenly noticed Karita's bra.  
"Hey – where did you get that?" She asked, examining it. "What's it made out of?"  
"Hm?" Karita blinked. "Oh, I'm not sure… Gohana bought it me when she was out shopping – it stops them moving around when I train."  
"Mine does too, but… that one looks sturdier." Yasa said.

Karita puts her hand down Yasa's shirt and tugged at her sports bra.  
"Whoa!" Raditz and Bardock cried, their eyes widening. Piccolo's jaw dropped.  
"Actually Cell, I don't need it." He said.  
"No, mine's different." Karita stated, and took Yasa's hand. "Feel." Yasa hesitated, then tugged at Karita's bra.  
"Hm. It's good, I suppose…" She admitted. "But mine don't move much anyway."  
"That's because they're too small." Raditz grinned.  
"They are not!" Yasa barked.  
"You can borrow it if you want." Karita smiled, putting her shirt back on.  
"I think I'd rather just buy one…" Yasa sweat dropped.  
"Why don't you just try hers on now…?" Bardock said. "Y'know, to see if you like it…"

Yasa shot Bardock a death glare, while Frieza gagged in disgust.  
"Can we please stop talking about your bras now?" He growled. "We _were_ talking about me, let's continue with that."  
"Typical. Me, me, me…" Bardock sniped.  
"Hey – you had a **movie** , you can hardly complain!" Frieza argued.  
"Even that was about you!" Bardock protested.  
"I just thought… Niichan, did you meet Zarbon-san the same way I met Zara-san?" Frikiza asked.  
"I don't see why it would be any different." Frieza shrugged.

Zarbon looked at Frikiza.  
"Did you meet her on her planet?" He asked. Frikiza looked down, ashamed.  
"… Yes." She answered quietly.  
"Let me guess – you destroyed it?" Yasa sniped. Frikiza looked away.  
"I was… a different person then." She said.

Zarbon went starry-eyed, and sighed into his memories.  
"I remember… Frieza came to my planet and destroyed my home. It was the happiest day of my life!"  
"Um… happiest?" Karita sweat dropped.  
"Of course." Zarbon nodded. I was wasted there but he rescued me from the torture!"

 _"I was just a young boy, sixteen or seventeen perhaps. By force I was engaged to a woman I hated and I struggled to get by in a cruel and homophobic world."_

On his home planet, a teenage Zarbon was working behind the bar in a nightclub. His face was heavily made up and he was wearing overly decorative earrings.  
"That's five twenty-six please, Sugar." He said, handing a male customer his drinks. The man handed Zarbon the money, and snorted at him in disgust.  
"I'll give you a tip if you promise to grow some fucking genitals, Nancyboy." He growled.  
"Bite me!" Zarbon snapped, and the customer stormed off.  
"Hey!"

Zarbon turned to see his manager approaching him angrily. "Don't talk to customers like that!"  
"He was being rude." Zarbon pouted.  
"Who the hell cares?" His boss growled. "He had a point anyway, Pansy. Aren't you supposed to be getting married to a _woman_?"  
"Not by choice." Zarbon muttered.  
"Well you could do a lot worse than her. Zamia's a godsend." His boss said, and walked off. The teenager Zarbon leaned on the bar and sighed.  
"I hate my life…"

 _"But then, suddenly…"_

"Hey!" A female customer gasped. "Look outside!"  
"Hm?" Zarbon looked out of the window, and saw a light descending down towards them.  
"What is that, an alien?" Someone piped up.  
"Wow…" Zarbon gasped, and ran for the door.  
"Hey!" His boss yelled after him. "Zarbon, come back here!" But Zarbon had already raced outside. He skidded to a halt underneath the light, and looked up.

 _*electric guitar/piano music*_

Zarbon gasped in awe, his eyes widening as a huge spaceship slowly lowers itself and landed on the ground…

 _The sirens are screaming and the fires are howling,  
Way down in the valley tonight.  
There's a man in the shadows with a gun in his eye,  
And a blade shining oh so bright. _

A crowd started to gather round the spaceship as Zarbon continued to stare. Then, the spaceship door opened and a shadowed figure stepped out. It stood in the ship's doorway, staring at them. Zarbon could just about make out its glowing red eyes…

 _There's evil in the air and there's thunder in sky,  
And a killer's on the bloodshot streets._

Zarbon tried to catch the figure's eye, when he heard familiar voices. He turned round to see Mom, Dad and Zamia heading for the bar.  
 _"Crap!"_ He thought silently. _"I'll be home soon, why are they visiting me?"_ He ran and hid around the side of the nightclub, his head poking round the corner so he could still watch the ship.

 _Oh and down in the tunnel where the deadly are rising,  
Oh I swear I saw a young boy down in the gutter,  
He was starting to foam in the heat._

Zarbon watched as the mysterious figure made his way down the steps towards the crowd…

 _Oh baby you're the only thing in this whole world,  
That's pure and good and right.  
And wherever you are and wherever you go,  
There's always gonna be some light._

The figure smirked at the crowd and raises his index finger. He formed a small ki ball on his fingertip, and Zarbon's jaw dropped when the figure pointed the ki ball at the crowd.

 _But I gotta get out,  
I gotta break it out now,  
Before the final crack of dawn.  
So we gotta make the most of our one night together.  
When it's over you know,  
We'll both be so alone._

The figure suddenly blasted the nightclub away and every member of the crowd went with it, creating explosions everywhere.

 _Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone when the morning comes.  
When the night is over  
Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone gone gone.  
Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone when the morning comes._

"Whoa!" Zarbon cried. He ran and jumped out of the way just as the nightclub was destroyed, and he then desperately raced through the city, ducking behind buildings for cover. The mysterious figure rose up above the ground and started destroying everything around him. In the distance, Zarbon could see his family running for safety, then the figure noticed them, and smirked.

 _But when the day is done and the sun goes down,  
And the moonlights shining through,  
Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven,  
I'll come crawling on back to you._

Zarbon's eyes widened as the figure destroyed his parents and fiancée right before his very eyes.

 _I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram,  
On a silver black phantom bike.  
When the metal is hot and the engine is hungry,  
And we're all about to see the light._

"Fuck!" Zarbon cried, and ran. The figure noticed Zarbon running. He smirked and chased him, knowing that the chase was making Zarbon more afraid.

 _Nothing ever grows in this rotting old hole.  
Everything is stunted and lost.  
And nothing really rocks  
And nothing really rolls  
And nothing's ever worth the cost._

Zarbon ran breathlessly, his heart racing as the figure followed him closely behind.

 _And I know that I'm damned if I never get out,  
And maybe I'm damned if I do,  
But with every other beat I've got left in my heart,  
You know I'd rather be damned with you.  
If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned,  
Dancing through the night with you._

The figure sped up and started firing ki blasts at Zarbon, deliberately missing just to scare him. Zarbon ran faster, breathing hard.

 _If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned.  
Gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned.  
If I gotta be damned you know I wanna be damned,  
Dancing through the night_

Zarbon turned a corner, into a dead end.

 _Dancing through the night_

The figure stopped behind Zarbon, who turned around to stare at him, his heart pounding fiercely against his ribcage and eyes wide with fright.

 _Dancing through the night with you._

The figure stood in front of Zarbon, smirking at him.  
"Well well. We meet at last." He purred.  
"Don't…" Zarbon panted, out of breath. "Don't kill me."  
"Oh, that's what they all say…" The figure said, steadily approaching him.  
"You killed my family." Zarbon breathed.  
"And the rest of your planet will be gone before nightfall." The figure replied. "I suppose you want an apology?"  
"No." Zarbon answered.  
"Hm?"

 _Oh baby you're the only thing in this whole world,  
That's pure and good and right.  
And wherever you are and wherever you go,  
There's always gonna be some light._

Zarbon stepped forward, and stared into the figure's eyes.  
"Take me with you!"

 _But I gotta get out,  
I gotta break it out now,  
Before the final crack of dawn._

"I hate this planet!" Zarbon cried. "I'm engaged to a second-rate woman, I'm working in a club full of ignorant men that get offended by a man wearing make-up – I'm gay and this planet is punishing me for it! Please, whoever you are…" He looked at the figure pleadingly. "Take me away from here."

 _So we gotta make the most of our one night together.  
When it's over you know,  
We'll both be so alone._

The figure, paused, then turned on his scouter.  
"… Quite an impressive power level." He remarked. "How old are you?"  
"Sixteen, Sir." Zarbon answered.  
"What is your name?" The figure asked.  
"Zarbon."  
"Well, Zarbon." The figure said, and threw him a scouter. "You have one chance. Go and prove yourself."

 _Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone when the morning comes.  
When the night is over  
Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone gone gone._

The teenage Zarbon sailed through his home planet, blowing up cities and buildings, his ki blasts exploding all over the planet while the figure watched.

 _Like a bat out of hell  
I'll be gone when the morning comes._

Zarbon looked at the figure.  
"Did I make it yet?" He asked.  
"… Are you fussy about hours?" The figure shrugged.  
"No, Sir." Zarbon answered.  
"Alright." The figure smirked. "You have a week's trial."

 _But when the day is done and the sun goes down,  
And the moonlights shining through,_

"Thank you!" Zarbon exclaimed. "Oh – … what is your name?"  
" **You** are to call me Lord Frieza." The figure replied.  
"' _Lord_ ' Frieza?" Zarbon frowned.  
"Problem?" Frieza questioned.  
"N-No Sir!" Zarbon gasped. "Lord Frieza it is."  
"Hm." Frieza grunted. "Your aim is a little off – here, watch me." He started blasting buildings while Zarbon watched him.

 _Then like a sinner before the gates of heaven,  
I'll come crawling on back to you._

Zarbon watched Frieza in awe as the alien blasted away. A white background appeared behind Frieza and his movements seemed to slow down as Zarbon was captivated by him. He moved so angelically, so much like a god… Frieza paused for a moment, then looked at Zarbon. He smirked at him, and Zarbon smiled back.

 _"… And… I've never looked back since."_

Back in the present time, Zarbon was smiling dreamily.  
"My only regret was not meeting my Lord sooner." He said.

Meanwhile, everyone was staring at him in shock.  
"That is…" Bardock uttered.  
"Sick." Raditz said.  
"Yeah." Bardock nodded.  
"What the hell kind of a kid wants to blow up his own planet?" Yasa growled.  
"I hated it there!" Zarbon cried. "Do you realise if Lord Frieza hadn't shown up I would be married to a woman by now? In some terrible ugly person's job! But – thanks to Frieza I am now the fiancé of the universe's most feared tyrant!" Frieza grinned proudly as Zarbon continued on. "Money, fame, protection – _jewellery_! What more could I want?"  
"How about an inch of self-respect?" Bardock grunted.  
"Oh sure, in a perfect world…" Zarbon retorted.  
"But don't you ever wonder…" Raidisha began. "What if someone better comes along? He can replace you easily, right?"

Zarbon gasped.  
"You little –"  
"I doubt that will happen, Raidisha." Frieza said. "Zarbon had to prove himself to get to where he is today."  
"That's right!" Zarbon huffed. "When I first started I was no better than you, but after years of hard work and beautiful looks – in fact you could have become what I am yourself if you had just worked a little harder and undergone some intense plastic surgery."  
"Really…?" Raidisha uttered, looking at him. "So… Vegeta might've taken your place someday?"  
"No, of course not!" Zarbon yelled.  
"But you just said –"  
"Zara-san was like a big sister to me, even though she was younger…" Frikiza said. "And Zarbon-san is dating Niichan so… I know he wouldn't be replaced. But Dodoria-san…" She looked at Frieza. "Right?"

Frieza shrugged.  
"Well, he's useless." He admitted. "I only have him there because sadly I've found nobody better to replace him; I keep sending him on away missions so I don't have to look at him all day."  
"I know, he's disgusting…" Zarbon gagged.  
"I see, so Dodoria would be replaced…" Raidisha mumbled, then grinned. "Imagine it! Lord Frieza sitting in his chair with Zarbon and Yasa-sama at his side! Kawaii!"  
"It is **not** kawaii!" Yasa screamed, smacking her. "Anyway, it'd be Vegeta, not me!"  
"You're better than Vegeta, Yasa-sama!" Raidisha insisted.  
"Well, I won't deny that." Yasa said with a smirk.  
"Well… you're only better because you're smaller so there's less of you." Frieza sniped.  
"I think less of **you** is needed." Yasa growled.  
"Well I have four forms, Dear, just pick your favourite." Frieza retorted.  
"No thanks." Yasa smirked. "I think I'll go talk to Coola, there's more of a form choice there."

Frieza glared at her angrily.  
"Don't start again…" Karita sighed. "Boxas said he'd blame me if anything else got broken…"  
"Huh? Kari-chan, _you're_ getting blamed for their fighting?" Raidisha gasped, and Karita nodded sadly. "I see…" Raidisha mumbled. She looked at Yasa and Frieza, and grinned. "Fight all you want, you've got nothing to lose!"

Karita sweat dropped, while Frieza laughed.  
"Raidisha, I think I'm starting to get along with you." He smirked, causing Raidisha to grin widely. Bardock looked at Raditz and growled,  
"Do you see now why I don't consider her my daughter?"


	16. Xmas Party 07 - Wedding Bells

There was a knock on the door to Capsule Corps. Vegeta answered the door to see King Kold standing there.  
"What do you want?" He demanded.  
"I came for the party." King Kold said.  
"What makes you think you're invited?" Vegeta growled.  
"I was invited!" King Kold protested.  
"What?" Vegeta frowned.

All of a sudden, Raidisha's voice called from the background.  
"Hey, Fri-Papa! Make yourself at home!"  
" _ **Raidisha**_!" Vegeta roared.  
"See?" King Kold said and pushed past Vegeta. "Where do you keep the wine?"  
"Through here!" Raidisha beamed, and showed him through.  
"This is **my** house!" Vegeta barked.  
"Who are you talking to?" Yasa uttered as she walked past him.  
"I'm talking to you! Don't run away from me!" Vegeta snapped, and went after her.

Meanwhile, Frieza was looking through a wedding catalogue with Zarbon.  
"Ooo! Can we have one of those?" Zarbon grinned, pointing at the catalogue. Frieza let out a loud sigh.  
"You're going to clean me out more than a woman…" He growled.  
"Please, Lord Frieza?" Zarbon whined, hugging him.  
"Hmm…" Frieza grunted.

At that moment, Raidisha entered the room.  
"Surprise!" She exclaimed, and was shortly followed by King Kold.  
"Hm?" King Kold grunted as he stepped into the room.  
"Papa!" Frieza gasped, his eyes widening. Zarbon jumped away from him as Frieza threw the catalogue behind the sofa. "Ah… what – what are you doing here?" Frieza asked nervously.  
"Well, I got an invite." King Kold answered, and narrowed his eyes at Frieza. "Not from my son, might I mention."  
"Well… it isn't really your thing." Frieza replied.  
"Nor is it yours." King Kold said. "When did you start playing with monkeys?"  
"Hey." Yasa snarled, and stood in front of him. "You got a problem with monkeys?"  
"I have several problems." King Kold answered. "One of them in standing in front of me."  
"She doesn't have to stand!" Raidisha exclaimed. "Yasa-sama, get on your knees, he's a king!"  
"I will do no such thing, I don't care **what** he is!" Yasa yelled.

Raidisha put a hand on King Kold's arm.  
"The youth of today… No respect, right?" She sighed.  
"None at all." King Kold agreed, and sat down.  
"Raidisha, you're not that much older than me." Yasa growled. "Why did you even invite him anyway?"  
"I wanted to tell him the news!" Raidisha grinned.

Zarbon and Frieza's eyes widened.  
"No – Raidisha –"  
"Y'know, about his son's marriage." Raidisha smiled.  
"Marriage?" King Kold repeated.  
"Yeah!" Raidisha nodded. "Tonight Frieza proposed to Zar –"  
" _ **Shut up**_!" Frieza screamed, leaping onto her.  
"Fri-kun, not so hard!" Raidisha laughed. "You're touching me tail."  
" _Breathe another word to him and I'll rip it off_!" Frieza hissed.  
"Ooo…" Raidisha uttered, blushing.  
"Frieza…" King Kold seethed.

Frieza's heart stopped, and he looked up at King Kold nervously.  
"Yes, Papa?" He whimpered.  
"Can I have a word with you in private?" King Kold asked.  
"… Hai." Frieza squealed, and led his father into the kitchen.

Yasa looked at Raidisha.  
"You okay?" She asked. Raidisha smiled shyly, holding her blushing cheeks.  
"I had no idea Fri-kun could be so… just right." She sighed. Yasa sweat dropped.  
"Don't ever let me hear you say that again…" She groaned, her face turning blue.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, King Kold was questioning his son.  
"What is this marriage she's talking about?" He demanded. "You already have a wife."  
"Yes, but… I… want another one?" Frieza nervously replied.  
"And _who_ exactly have you proposed to?" King Kold growled.  
"Uh… well…" Frieza stammered.

At that moment, Raidisha leaned against the doorway.  
"Hehehe!" She giggled and waved at Frieza flirtatiously, before returning to the others.  
" _ **Her**_!" King Kold wailed.  
"No! Father –"  
"A saiyan scumbag!" King Kold advanced on his son. "Boy, I should _rip_ your –"  
"I'm marrying a princess!" Frieza screamed.  
"A saiyan princess!" King Kold roared.  
"Yes!" Frieza cried.  
"Wait - - Yasa?" King Kold blinked.  
"Yes!" Frieza nodded, then quickly realised what he'd said. "… Oh. No, I – … uh…"  
"Well if not her then who?" King Kold demanded.  
 _"Crap, crap!"_ Frieza thought, panicking. _"Good female, good female, good female… Out of all the women here tonight I cannot believe_ _ **she**_ _is the best!"_ He let out an angry sigh, then groaned. "Yes." Frieza mumbled defeatedly. "It's… Yasa."  
"Why?" King Kold gasped.  
"Why?" Frieza repeated. "… Well – uh… politics." He said. "I'm trying to rebuild the alliance between my empire and the saiyans."  
"Aren't there only two?" King Kold blinked.  
"Well, sixteen including their children and the girls and the ones that are dead but still managed to make it here this evening." Frieza replied. "But… yes. To rebuild the alliance."  
"And why would you want to do that?" King Kold frowned.  
"Papa, why did I form an alliance with them the first time?" Frieza said. "Saiyans equals strength, which equals money, power and planets – all for the price of cheap labour."  
"Hm…" King Kold mused, considering the notion. "I see… Well. I don't think she'll let you exploit her people like that, but if she's agreed to marry you…"  
"Yasa's become a lot calmer since she was seventeen." Frieza said.  
"Really?" King Kold uttered, surprised.  
"Yes." Frieza nodded. He put arm around King Kold. "Believe me Papa, you don't need to worry about her."  
"Hm…" King Kold grunted, walking towards the door with Frieza. "Well, if she's going to be my daughter it's good to know she's no longer that violent back-chatting teenager that had absolutely no respect for men or rules."  
"Haha!" Frieza laughed. "Goodness no, not in a million –"

Frieza looked up, and his eyes widened in horror at the sight of Yasa holding Dodoria above her by his throat.  
" **What** did you call me?" Yasa roared.  
"B-But you are a monkey!" Dodoria cried.  
"And you're the Blob!" Yasa snarled. "A – _**pologise**_!" She threw Dodoria across the room and into the wall, then blasted him.  
"Fine, I'm sorry!" Dodoria cried, screaming in pain.  
"I can't _hear you_ …" Yasa hissed.  
"I'm –"  
"Ahem!" Yasa was interrupted by King Kold clearing his throat. "Yasa."

Yasa looked up, and glared at him.  
"What do you want, Gramps?" She demanded. Meanwhile, Frieza was burying his face in his hands.  
"Even when I was slowly killing Vegeta I was speaking to him politely, why is civil conversation so difficult for you…?" He groaned.  
"What sort of venue do you want for the wedding?" King Kold asked Yasa.  
"I don't care, it's Frieza's wedding." Yasa shrugged.  
"Aha!" Frieza grinned. "See Papa? The woman knows her place!"  
"Very good…" King Kold nodded, impressed. "Yasa, I never thought you could change so much."  
"Hm?" Yasa blinked, and looked herself up and down. "Oh, well… it's been twenty five years, King Kold. You've changed too."  
"Quite – but anyway." King Kold said. "What actually made you agree to marry my son?"

Frieza's eyes widened.  
"Ah –"  
" _ **What**_!" Yasa screamed.  
"Uh… his son?" Nanapa gasped, as Dodoria's jaw dropped.

Zarbon buried his face in his hands.  
"Oh no…" He groaned. "Out of all the people he could've said… _Goka_ would have played along out of sheer stupidity!"  
"Wow, Yasa-sama's getting a second husband?" Raidisha beamed. "But which one? Coola's the obvious choice as far as looks, power and money are concerned, but Fri-kun's got a sort of charm…"  
"You've thought about this, haven't you?" Zarbon growled.  
"Jealous?" Raidisha winked.  
"Yasa, have you told Boxas about this?" Karita frowned, looking at her disapprovingly.  
"About **what**?" Yasa barked. "I am _not_ –"

Frieza grabbed hold of her before she could speak another word.  
"Yasa can I talk to you in private for a moment, Dear!" He cried, and dragged her into the kitchen.  
"Get off me!" Yasa shrieked. She squirmed out of his grip and pushed him against the worktop. " **What** have you been saying?" Yasa snarled, pinning Frieza down.  
"Listen – your loud-mouthed _stirrer_ underling was about to tell my father about me and Zarbon!" Frieza growled.  
"What, he doesn't know?" Yasa blinked.  
"None of my family do – they think I'm straight." Frieza replied.

Yasa burst out laughing.  
"Seriously!" She laughed. "Have they actually _met_ you?"  
"Oh sure, sure, laugh it up…" Frieza growled. "The point is – I couldn't let him know I'm marrying Zarbon so I had to say somebody else."  
"But why _me_?" Yasa hissed.  
"Because! You were - - … …" Frieza paused, his cheeks darkening in embarrassment. Yasa awaited his response, and Frieza lowered his head in shame. "You were the best one." He mumbled.

Yasa tossed her hair arrogantly.  
"Well. I can't disagree with you there." She smirked.  
"Oh, stop feeding your ego, one day it'll devour you." Frieza growled.  
"Hmph! You're one to talk!" Yasa argued. " 'Oh, I am the most fearful emperor in the universe, nobody can defeat me…' – Remind me, _how_ many times have the saiyans beaten you now?"  
"Oh, shut up." Frieza snarled. "Are you going to play along or not?"  
"… Fine." Yasa growled. "But I want a third of your empire."  
"What!" Frieza cried. "Like hell you are! I'd rather tell me father I'm marrying Zarbon!"  
"Oh, well let me save you the bother." Yasa smirked, and called towards the door. "Oh, King Kold –"  
"Ssh!" Frieza hissed, clasping his hand over her mouth. "Okay, fine! A third! But it won't be the good third!" He removed his hand from her mouth, and Yasa yelled again,  
"King Kold –"  
" _ **Okay**_!" Frieza screamed, covering her mouth again. He glared at Yasa. "Fine, the good third – but you had better be the most convincing fiancée **ever** , otherwise you'll be coming to hell with me!"  
"Don't worry." Yasa replied, and took hold of his arm. "Let's go plan a wedding."


	17. Xmas Party 08 - Protective Big Brothers

**Author's Note:-**  
Just FYI, back when I wrote this it was before Tarble existed, so this sketch is kind of irrelevant not, but hopefully still enjoyable :) Also when I wrote this I thought Celipa was Bardock's sister, because I read somewhere that they were siblings in a special Japanese version of the Bardock Special… I no longer think that's true, but it might be. That would be nice n_n Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

Late into the evening, Frieza, King Vegeta and Bardock were all drinking.  
"Hey, hey – hey!" King Vegeta slurred in a drunken state, forcefully tapping Frieza on the shoulder. "Hey… hey… **Hey**! Hey –"  
"What the fuck do you want!" Frieza demanded.  
"I have no siblings, I need to ask… is it true that big brothers are protective over their sisters?" King Vegeta asked. Bardock shrugged, unable to give an opinion.  
"Why are you looking at me?" Frieza growled at King Vegeta.  
"Well what about Frikiza?" King Vegeta said.  
"She's not my sister; she's the girl version of me." Frieza replied.  
"Right, but… she's like a little sister." King Vegeta shrugged.  
"No she's not." Frieza argued.  
"Yes she is." King Vegeta said.  
"No she's not!" Frieza barked.  
"Okay – so if some guy tried it on with her, you wouldn't feel protective?" King Vegeta asked.  
"Of course not." Frieza answered stubbornly.  
"Well good." Bardock smirked. "Because for a lizard she ain't half cute –"

Frieza immediately punched Bardock, and King Vegeta burst out laughing while Bardock lay on the floor with a broken nose. "Told ya…" Bardock said, and pulled himself up.  
"Hmph!" Frieza grunted. "That was nothing to do with me being her brother. The thought of a saiyan with an icejin alone is enough to make anybody sick."  
"Really…?" Bardock uttered, and whistled. "Hey! Emo Cell!"

Meanwhile, Cell had been stood in the corner of the room with his arms folded. He looked up in response to Bardock. "You know… you don't actually have to act like Vegeta to get out of joining in with the conversation." Bardock said.  
"Was that an insult against my son!" King Vegeta barked, jumping up.  
"No." Bardock lied. King Vegeta paused, then peacefully downed another bottle of vodka.  
"What is it?" Cell demanded.

Bardock looked at Frieza.  
"Him?" He asked.  
"Well, he's not ideal…" Frieza admitted. "But if there were no more icejins around…"  
"You have no problem with him?" Bardock questioned.  
"No." Frieza replied.

Bardock turned to Cell.  
"What do you think of that Frikiza? Would you do her?" He asked.  
"Looks-wise?" Cell shrugged. "She's not bad, I don't think I'd say no –" Then he suddenly got a bottle of vodka thrown in his face; it smashed and Cell's eyes stop existing. King Vegeta jumped up in a rage and leaned across the table to Frieza.  
"What the fuck are you doing!" He screamed. "There was still vodka in that!" He picked up another bottle. "You son of a bitch!" He smashed the bottle and waved it in Frieza's face, at which point Frieza looked at the vodka from the second bottle, which was now all over the table, and moved his eyes to King Vegeta. "… There was vodka in that one too!" King Vegeta barked after a long pause, and smacked the empty bottle over Frieza's head.  
"I love my first form…" Frieza sighed, wiping the glass off his unharmed, armoured head.  
"I think I've proved my point." Bardock said, smirking at Frieza.  
"Fine, but you're the same with your sister." Frieza growled.  
"I am not!" Bardock argued. "My sister can do what she wants, she's a grown woman."  
"Who, Celipa?" King Vegeta uttered. "Now there's a peasant I wouldn't mind knighting…"

Bardock suddenly leapt up and smacked King Vegeta as hard as he possibly could. Frieza flinched in shock, and Bardock's eyes widened as he realised what he had done. Frieza smirked as he watched King Vegeta wipe the blood away from jaw and look at Bardock. "… What just happened?" King Vegeta asked.

Bardock immediately fell to his knees.  
"Forgive me, Sire!" He cried. Frieza let out a sigh.  
"I can't remember the last time I got a saiyan down on his knees…" He mumbled. "Oh – yes I do." He looked at King Vegeta and grinned. "It was your son."  
" _ **What**_ –"  
"He was fixing one of my plug sockets." Frieza said, interrupting King Vegeta. "I never could do those things. I grew up with cutlery."  
"Engineers have education too." Bardock frowned.  
"Ew…" Frieza gagged.  
"Right…" King Vegeta grunted, standing up. "I'm going for a slash."  
"Thank God you have money; you wouldn't be able to get a girl with your charms." Frieza sniped.  
"Saiyan girls don't need charms." King Vegeta winked, and raised his arm. "Just power!" He then proceeded to fall backwards, and banged his head on the worktop. He blacked out – not knocked unconscious, just asleep.  
"… Yes, I see the appeal." Frieza remarked, looking at the drunken King Vegeta. "It's a wonder why you only had the one boy in all the _year_ of marriage." He remarked, and started to cackle.  
"You're an evil bastard." Bardock growled.  
"Laugh at my evil!" Frieza exclaimed. "Cell! Are you still listening!"  
"No I'm not, you glassed me!" Cell barked, rubbing his eyes. "But yes I am still listening; I have no sight so my other senses are heightened."  
"Really?" Frieza blinked.  
"Well of course not, who the hell believes that horseshit?" Cell growled.  
"It's scientifically proven –" Bardock began.  
"Bardock, with respect I lost all faith in scientists the minute I read on a DBZ rumour page somewhere that **you** were one." Cell said, cutting him off.  
"Whatever…" Bardock mumbled.

He folded his arms in annoyance, and sighed. "I can't believe I'm so protective over my sister… What a loser!"  
"Yes you are a loser." Frieza nodded.  
"What – you're protective over Frikiza too!" Bardock protested.  
"I have every reason to be!" Frieza argued. "You have no excuse; Celipa is a strong, independent, reasonably well-adjusted girl – for a saiyan, anyway… You have no reason to protect her. Frikiza however… is essentially a walking Barbie doll that still has the mental age of a five-year-old."  
"And to think she's your alternate –"  
"Don't make me mention your retarded son!" Frieza barked, causing Bardock to glare at him. "Anyway…" Frieza continued. "Frikiza needs to be looked out for. Later tonight I've hired the Ginyu Force to attack and kill her when she's alone."

Bardock went quiet, suddenly bewildered, while Frieza calmly took a sip of his drink.  
"… Why the hell have you done that…?" Bardock asked.  
"Well apparently I'm her big brother. I did train her once upon a time; I need to make sure she's still keeping up with herself." Frieza answered.  
"Gee, you're right. I shouldn't have trained Celipa the normal way, I should've hired a group of mercenaries to gang up and kill her!" Bardock sarcastically replied.  
"It's a good thing you didn't fork out, I did it for free." Frieza smirked, causing Bardock to glare at him again. "No need to thank me." Frieza said.  
"Oh, good." Bardock snarled.


	18. Xmas Party 09 - Drunk King Vegeta

**Author's Note:-**  
I'm sorry there was no update last week. I've been focusing more on The Nameks as I'm really into that fic right now and I'm sure nobody is interested in Generation 3... even I'm not interested in Generation 3 most of the time n_n' I really wish I'd written and/or finished all the Gen 3 sketches I thought of back when I was passionate about it... I think some of this stuff is good, but I'm not sure if I have it in me to continue it now, or even write up my old ideas...  
Anyway, I do like this sketch. It's very short, and was probably planned to be the first part of a bigger sketch back in the day, but... this is all there is now. I think it's funny, even if it isn't very big. Enjoy!

* * *

Deep into the evening, Vegeta and Frieza were in yet another argument.  
"You destroyed our planet!" Vegeta screamed.  
"Oh, trust you to drag that up, Vegeta." Frieza snorted. "Even your father doesn't care about that anymore."  
" _ **What**_? Yes he does!" Vegeta yelled.

Meanwhile King Vegeta was on the floor, heavily intoxicated.  
"Buh… Blabiboba." He mumbled to himself.  
"No he doesn't." Frieza said, and kicked King Vegeta. "Vegeta, what do you care about?"  
"S… Saiya…" King Vegeta uttered, and threw up.  
"See? He's forgiven me." Frieza said to Vegeta.  
"He's not forgiven you! He's just drunk!" Vegeta argued.  
"Oh, tomáto tomato." Frieza shrugged.  
" _ **What**_!" Vegeta screamed. He turned super saiyan, and proceeded to attack Frieza.


	19. Xmas Party 10 - The Youth Of Today

Bardock and King Vegeta were all moping in the kitchen, depressed by the youth of today.  
"Y'know, where I come from we punish kids that don't do what they're told." Bardock said.  
"Punish?" Goten gasped.  
"That's right." Bardock snorted. "It doesn't look like you know the meaning of the word."  
"Hey! I'm a super saiyan!" Goten protested.  
"Yeah, right!" Bardock growled. "Prove it."  
"Uh… okay." Goten shrugged. He turned super saiyan, causing Bardock to go wide-eyed.

XXXXX

Meanwhile, the other party guests were in the living room when Bardock came running in with the super saiyan Goten.  
"Hahahaha!" He exclaimed triumphantly. " _ **Look**_! Just try to kill us now, Frieza! My grandson is the legendary super saiyan!"  
"… Bardock, what are you rambling on about?" Frieza frowned.  
"Does nobody tell you anything?" Cell sniggered.  
"Huh?" Bardock blinked.  
" _Uh, Dad_?"

Bardock looked up to see Goku standing there, alongside Vegeta and Trunks. They were all in their super saiyan form.  
"We're all super saiyans." Goku said.  
"Yeah, what's the big deal?" Trunks shrugged. Bardock went quiet, dumbstruck and offended by how casually they were treating it.  
"I know." Vegeta and King Vegeta sighed.

XXXXX

A short while later, Frieza, Bardock and King Vegeta were sitting in the kitchen, drowning their sorrows.  
"Geez… What is wrong with the world today?" Bardock groaned.  
"Tell me about it." King Vegeta sighed.  
"Mm-hm." Frieza nodded.  
"Y'know, when I was a kid the legendary super saiyan was just a dream. Now you're a freak if you can't make that transformation." Bardock growled. "The power levels of kids today are scary."  
"Oh, without a doubt, in every manner." King Vegeta nodded in agreement. "Even their attitudes towards royalty is horrifying. When I was a boy I would have given anything to be a king – being any sort of royalty at all is an honour!"  
"Of course it is, Sire." Bardock agreed.  
"But that boy, the only advantage he sees to being a royal saiyan is that he might get some cash out of it!" King Vegeta protested.  
"It's disgusting." Frieza growled. "Kids today."  
"Mm-hm." King Vegeta and Bardock nodded in agreement.


	20. Xmas Party 11 - When I Was Your Age

After a lot of drinking, a drunken Vegeta was targeting Trunks.  
"You kids, you bastard kids! You don't know _**anything**_!" He yelled. "You think being grounded for a day is tough!"  
"Yeah, you tell 'em, Prince!" Bardock cheered. "You seen my grandson? Spoilt rotten!"  
"I try to teach the boy but his mother spoils him." Vegeta insisted.  
"I'm not spoilt!" Trunks argued.  
" _ **Ha**_!" Vegeta laughed. "You wanna take a look at my childhood! Actually – that can be my next song!"  
"You're singing _another_ one?" Bardock groaned, after hearing several badly-sung songs from Vegeta.  
"Hey, shut up!" Vegeta snapped. "Goddamn peasant!"  
"What are you talking about, Vegeta? Your childhood was perfect compared to mine." Frieza said.  
"Aw, geez, I forgot how tough it is getting _**everything**_ you want all the time!" Vegeta snarled.  
"You don't know the half of it!" Frieza growled.  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." Vegeta snorted dismissively.  
"Shut up!" Frieza barked.

He leapt up just as the music started playing. "This is _my_ song!"  
"No, it's mine!" Vegeta yelled.  
"Like hell it is! This song belongs to me!" Bardock cried, also jumping up.  
"Of course, Bardock." Frieza sniped sarcastically.  
"Hey! I grew up in the _**slums**_!" Bardock snarled. "My hometown was like a saiyan version of Detroit!"  
"It's nothing compared to Frieza's ship!" Vegeta argued.  
"None of you have any idea what you're talking about." Frieza huffed, and started to sing, " _Let me tell you, Sonny, let me tell you straight,  
You kids today ain't never had it rough_,"

Vegeta glared at Frieza and kicked him out of the way, yanking his mic off him.  
" _Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate,  
You lazy brats think nothing's good enough_!"

Bardock jumped up and snatched the mic off Vegeta.  
" _Well, nobody ever drove me to school when it was ninety degrees below,  
We had to walk buck naked through forty miles of snow_,"  
"Like saiyans even go to school!" Frieza snorted.  
"They do too!" Bardock argued and continued singing. " _Worked in the coal mines twenty two hours a day for just half a cent_ –"  
" _Had to sell my internal organs just to pay the rent_!" Frieza took over.  
"Who cares, you lose a limb and your father gives you a billion dollar robotic one." Vegeta sniped.

Frieza glared at him,  
" _When I was your age_ –" He began, before Vegeta snatched the mic off him and sang,  
" _When I was your age.  
When I was your age. When I was your age_,"

Frieza forcefully kicked Vegeta away and grabbed the mic.  
" _Let me tell you something, you whiny little snot,  
There's something wrong with all you kids today.  
You just don't appreciate all the things you've got_,"  
"It's not me with the problem." Vegeta growled, and screamed at Goten and Trunks, " _We were hungry, broken and miserable, and we liked it fine that way_!"  
"Could've fooled me…" Frieza mumbled.  
"Hey!" Vegeta barked.

Bardock started singing,  
" _There were seventy three of us living in a cardboard box_!  
 _All I got for Christmas was a lousy bag of rocks_ ,"  
"At least you got something for Christmas…" Vegeta muttered angrily.  
"I gave you a bottle of wine!" Frieza protested.  
"No, you passed out on the floor and I took it out of your hand." Vegeta argued.  
"I was going to give it to you." Frieza said.  
"What, when it was empty?" Vegeta snarled.  
"Of course when it was empty! Do I look like I'm made of money?" Frieza protested.  
" _ **Yes**_!" Vegeta yelled. "And you spent all of it on yourself!"  
"At least someone around your place had money." Bardock grunted. " _Every night for dinner, we had a big ol' chunk of dirt,  
If we were really good, we didn't get dessert_!  
 _When I was your age. When I was your age.  
When I was your age. When I was your age_!"  
" _Didn't have no telephone, didn't have no FAX machine_!" Vegeta took over. " _All we had was a couple cans and a crummy piece of string_ ,"  
"And a **scouter**." Frieza barked. "You are such a little ingrate!"  
" _Didn't have no swimming pool when I was just a lad_ ," Bardock continued. " _Our neighbour's septic tank was the closest thing we had_!"  
"Ew…" Frieza gagged, and took over. " _Didn't have no dental floss, had to use old rusty nails,  
Didn't have Nintendo, we just poured salt on snails_."  
"You would." Vegeta sniped. " _Didn't have no water bed, had to sleep on broken glass_."  
" _Didn't have no lawnmower, we used our teeth to cut the grass_ ," Bardock sang.

Trunks stared at the adults, unimpressed, and yawned sarcastically.  
"Okay, I have better things to do than listen to drunks complain." He said. "Come on, Goten, let's go." He started to leave with Goten, but Vegeta jumped in their way.  
" _What's the matter now, Sonny, you say you don't believe this junk_?" Vegeta sang.  
" _You think my story's wearin' kinda thin_?" Frieza took over, glaring at the boys.  
" _I tell you one thing, I never was such a disrespectful punk_!" Bardock barked at them. " _Back in my time, we had a thing called_ _ **discipline**_! _  
My dad would whoop us every night 'til a quarter after twelve._ "  
" _Then he'd get too tired and he'd make us whoop ourselves_!" Vegeta took over.  
" _Then he'd chop me into pieces and play Frisbee with my brain_ ," Frieza sang.  
" _He remembers that_?" King Kold gasped, wide-eyed. _  
_" _And let me tell ya, Junior_ ," Frieza sang. " _ **You never heard me complain**_! _  
When I was your age. When I was your age,  
When I was your age_."

Frieza, Bardock and Vegeta all sang together,  
" _When I was your age_!"


End file.
